


My beautiful Angel

by TosMichiyo



Series: Guardian Angels [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-13
Updated: 2018-10-30
Packaged: 2018-10-31 07:59:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 7
Words: 33,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10895070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TosMichiyo/pseuds/TosMichiyo
Summary: A voice in the distance kept repeating one sentence, keeping him sane amidst the chaos inside his mind.‘You’re Harry James Potter, born on 31 July 1980.’He was Harry James Potter, The-Boy-Who-Lived. He was the son of James Potter and Lily Potter née Evans. Before that life however he had been Hadrian, Tom’s Guardian Angel. With all his memories intact, all lies were now revealed and there was no denying this utter betrayal he felt.Yet Harry’s path was clear and even now he would do anything to protect Tom. He would do anything to make sure Tom was safe and whole. This time he would make it right.  This time he wouldn’t fail Tom. This time he had help from an unlikely source, Tom himself.Sequel to Guardian Angel





	1. Fight Within

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters!
> 
> Hello :). Here is the first chapter. This is a sequel to my other story ‘Guardian Angel’ and I suggest reading that one first. Otherwise this story wouldn’t make any sense at all. 
> 
> I know this chapter is rather short, but it is only a kind of prologue. It gives you all an idea of what exactly happened when Harry disappeared at the end of Guardian Angel and where the story might be heading to. 
> 
> Anyway I am still overwhelmed by all the positive comments on Guardian Angel, especially the last chapter. So many thanks and this is for all those who couldn’t wait XD. 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy this story as well :).  
> And sadly all mistakes are still my own(English still isn’t my mother language either T.T)! Though if anyone is willing to beta-read this story, please let me know :)?

### Chapter 1: Fight Within

  
*I try to face the fight within  
But it's over  
I'm ready for the riot to begin  
And surrender  
I walked the path that led me to the end  
_Remember_  
I'm caught beneath with nothing left to give  
Forever  
* Breaking Benjamin, Angels Fall  
  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  


Memories that were his, and yet not, swept through his mind, breaking and destroying everything in their path. His mind was out of his control and he didn’t even know anymore who he was. A voice in the distant said something. _‘You’re Harry James Potter, born on 31 July 1980.’_  
  
He knew Harry Potter… that was him. His name had been Harry James Potter or was it still?  
  
The knowledge of what had happened in that particular life felt devastating when he focused upon Harry Potter’s memories. Somehow he could feel something inside him cry out. It was his soul that was crying out, hurt and betrayed by his own soulmate.    
  
Yet he shouldn’t have expected anything else from Tom Marvolo Riddle… Tom always had been a master manipulator and only cared for himself.  
  
As those thoughts filled his mind Harry faded away, surrendering to it all. Once again memories of different lives overflowed and he once again didn’t know who he was or where he was even.  
  
Was he living in 1910? Was he Lazarus? Was he Hadrian? Or was he Harry? Or anyone of those other lives? The memories didn’t stop; they kept coming at him, overwhelming him completely.  
  
A voice, the same familiar voice as before said something, but above everything else he could barely hear it.  
  
Despite it, the voice kept talking and he tried to focus upon it. As if he needed to hold onto something, anything, and that voice was like an anchor, tying him down, making sure that he didn’t completely drown in all those memories.  
  
All the other sounds and voices seemed to fade into the background; oddly enough he could still hear the sound of waves and that one familiar voice sounded far clearer now. _‘You’re Harry James Potter, born on 31 July 1980.’_  
  
He recognized the voice then… It was Tom’s voice… And he hated him right now. Anger bubbled up inside of him and clouded his mind, shutting the voice down.  
  
Just as quickly the other memories rushed back in and the sound of the peaceful waves faded away. Thousands of voices and sounds echoed all around him and he couldn’t focus upon a single one of them. It sounded far too loud, but still he preferred this…  
  
That voice, Tom, had brought him into this state, and lied to him. He hated Tom… at this point he simply hated his soulmate.  


  
He watched, unaware of the passing of time, as the memories filled his mind. He saw and knew everything. An angel’s love is unconditional… How foolish that sounded when all of this was revealed.  
  
Hadrian had loved Tom Riddle so deeply and had been blinded by the lust and desire that Tom felt for his guardian angel.  
  
He still didn’t know who or where he was exactly and the voice he heard before sounded through the haze of memories clearer than before, as if not willing to let him go. _‘You’re Harry James Potter.’_ The voice kept repeating the same sentence.  
  
Harry James Potter… Focusing upon those memories once more he saw what had happened in that life. Feelings of hurt, utter betrayal and fury went through him again.  
  
A mere memory preserved in a diary? Tom was a filthy liar. The diary was a horcrux, had always been a horcrux, not a mere memory.  
  
The potion won’t hurt him? Voldemort had lied as well… Voldemort knew exactly what the potion would do to him. Had seen what it did by using it on several test subjects when he created it.  
  
And the memories of Hadrian revealed the awful truth of their lies… How ignorant and blind he had been, even as Harry…  
  
He felt betrayed and hurt and shut them all out. At times he could hear or feel them through their connection. He could also feel the horcrux inside him stirring in response, wanting to get closer to him, but he didn’t even let him in at this point.  
  
He ignored them all… even knowing that it was the horcrux inside of him that reminded him who he was. The horcrux reminded him to not lose sight of his current life and what had happened. Yet he also knew that Tom was merely unwilling to let him go.  
  
It would be so easy. He only had to let himself be consumed by all those memories and surely his mind would break. He could easily end it. Leave Tom behind and stay forever in a coma. Surely Tom would blame himself and it would serve him right after everything he had done.  
  
Part of him felt reluctant and therefor he didn’t let go just yet. Still it didn’t take away the anger he felt. He was beyond pissed at Tom and didn’t want to face him at all.  
  
A loud scream tore through his mind and green eyes closed as the memories from his previous lives went through his mind and he felt himself losing again. Once again the voice broke through, reminding him who he was. ‘ _You’re Harry James Potter.’_  
  
He hated it all…  



	2. The Horcrux inside

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucius is forced to write in the diary. Harry lets the horcrux inside him come closer and they leave Slytherin manor. Voldemort tries to locate Harry and fail. Diary Tom goes off to search for Harry on his own after that. Harry and the horcrux inside him are starting to gather the horcruxes.
> 
> Basically a lot happens in this chapter lol.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the next chapter :)! 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy it! All mistakes are still my own! And finally it is completely revealed what happened when Harry woke up :P. 
> 
> Anyway cya next update :). 
> 
> "Normal speaking"  
> 'Harry and the horcrux speaking inside their mind'
> 
> Slight warning for this chapter: Voldemort kisses Harry while he is still in a coma(nothing more than that happens). But I thought I should at least put the warning in here, just to be safe.

### Chapter 2: The Horcrux inside

“Write, Lucius,” Voldemort hissed at the blonde male. “All your deepest and darkest secrets, write them all inside that diary.”  
  
Voldemort’s command was clear, even though Lucius felt reluctant and wary. He knew there was no way he could ever disobey his Lord at this point. He had already made mistakes and as his eyes looked back at the small diary laying in front of him, he just knew.  
  
Lucius knew that this was somehow his punishment for handing out the diary. He glanced up at the figure who seemed blurry around the edges, but unmistakeably a handsome young teenager. He never recalled seeing someone like him before in the ranks of the Dark Lord and he had no idea why this blurry person was here…  
  
Lucius sighed softly, focusing once again and carefully put his quill in the ink bottle. As he started to write down everything, he saw every sentence disappearing, as if the diary was sucking the words in. At one point he heard the dark-haired teenager chuckle darkly and he barely suppressed a shiver.  
  
With every word he wrote a feeling of dread settled over him. It felt like his mind was becoming heavy, yet he couldn’t stop writing anymore. As if somehow his body wasn’t his own anymore.  
 

* * *

 

  
Voldemort watched the proceedings, red eyes cold as his servant wrote. In the end Lucius would lose his soul to the diary and his 16-year old horcrux would be fully resurrected.  
  
His younger self was naïve, but the two of them had a better chance in bringing Harry back than he alone had. And without Harry it was clear that his horcrux was slowly fading away again, being pulled back into the diary.  
  
Red eyes shifted towards his horcrux, whose eyes were fixed upon the blonde in clear amusement. At least one thing they had in common still, their amusement at other people’s expenses... He could hardly believe how weak he had been back then…  
  
Tom glanced up at him and the smirk faded from his face, replaced by a cold look of pure loathing. Despite that they came from the same origin, the same soul, it was clear they couldn’t get along very well.  
  
His younger self blamed him for what he had done to Harry… Voldemort broke the eye contact as he gazed at Lucius again. He knew that it might take one day or max two days until the blonde’s soul would be sucked into the diary and giving his horcrux a body again.  
  
He glided towards the door, glancing at Tom on his way out, who still had the same look of pure loathing on his face. Voldemort ignored him, knowing that he deserved it. He also blamed himself for what he had done. But he simply needed to know…  
  
His need to know if Harry was somehow truly Hadrian had pushed all his other thoughts to the background.  
  
Voldemort knew one thing however. Hadrian was strong and he was certain that his precious angel would return to him. Hadrian would wake up again, just like some of the test subjects of the potion also woke up. Hadrian wouldn’t stay in the coma state forever, Voldemort simply needed to wait for him.  
  
The problem was, maybe in the past he had been patient, but nowadays his patience was almost non-existent.  
  
Voldemort opened the door to Harry’s bedroom and carefully went in. He could just fool himself, telling himself that his angel was only asleep, such a terrible lie it was.  
  
Carefully he sat down next to the sleeping body. He placed both his hands upon Harry’s cheeks, feeling the soft warm skin beneath his cold hands. He could touch him now… but Hadrian was so far away. He couldn’t feel him or find him inside his mind. Even Tom had tried and had been unable to find him…  
  
Hadrian had slipped right through his fingers…  
  
Voldemort leaned forward and put his forehead against Harry’s. “Hadrian…” He muttered softly. “You promised forever… You need to come back to me.” Red eyes stared down at those closed eyes underneath him. There was no reaction… None at all.  
  
Voldemort let out a heavy breath as he placed his lipless mouth against those soft lips… As if the kiss could wake him up, just like that stupid fairy-tale, the sleeping beauty.  
  
Voldemort closed his eyes in defeat, as Harry remained asleep.  
**  
**

* * *

**  
  
** Tom sat next to Harry’s sleeping body, his hand touching the pale cheek. He spitted through Harry’s mind, but came up empty. At times he believed he could see or hear Harry, but the visions seemed to fade just as quickly, replaced by a blinding white light.  
  
It hurt him far more than he could ever admit. He never expected something like this to happen. They could only wait… And waiting wasn’t one of his strong suits when he longed for something like this.  
  
Voldemort had explained how he had created and tested the potion before this all. Eventually the test subjects woke up. The downside was that it sometimes took them a whole year to rearrange their mind and even then some had gone insane in the process.  
  
Some however had apparently never woken up again and were even now still in a coma. Tom had felt fear when there was a possibility that Harry might never wake up. That he maybe for the rest of his life would stare at the sleeping body, waiting forever, only to never see those emerald green eyes look at him again.  
  
Harry was strong however, Tom knew this. So he kept on hoping that one day Harry would wake up. He couldn’t give in to his despair, he needed to have hope.  
  
Even if it took a whole year, Tom would wait here forever for him. All Harry’s loved ones would wait forever. Sirius, Remus, Luna and sadly even his main soul.  
  
Voldemort had become withdrawn after Lucius’s death, not that Tom could blame him. They weren’t exactly on best terms with each other. How strange that was considering they were part of the same soul. Yet Tom hated how he had turned around, so blinded and arrogant.  
  
Voldemort clearly believed all of them were beneath him and even though Tom had the same view on others, he never believed Harry to be beneath him. After meeting the young child he never thought the green-eyed wizard was beneath him, but Tom believed that Voldemort’s views on Harry were different.  
  
Harry and he were soulmates and maybe that was the reason why Tom felt like they were more on equal ground. He couldn’t understand why Voldemort had seemed to deny this all.  
  
Even going so far that he offered Harry a potion that would restore his memories and might even break the boy’s mind completely.  
  
No, Tom didn’t understand his other self at all. Voldemort however didn’t seem to understand him either, saying he was young and naïve still. He hadn’t seen the world for what it truly was and hadn’t felt the powerful magic he had found years after.  
  
Tom had only stated that he was a fool and had split his soul so many times that it left him unstable. This made Voldemort furious and they had ended up in another duel, until Tom just apparated away from his other self, not in the mood to deal with an angry Dark Lord at all.  
  
Besides Voldemort’s magic was truly powerful and frightening in a way. It could completely destroy everything around him and it was clear to Tom that Voldemort was often not in control of it. No… he might have made mistakes during the years that let up to what he had become…  
  
It made him wonder what had exactly happened between Voldemort and Hadrian, but the Dark Lord would never answer his questions. Of that, Tom was certain.  
  
With a sad sigh Tom pulled out of Harry’s mind. The only thing he had found was white… Everything inside Harry’s mind was white. No matter how often he tried, he couldn’t reach him.

**  
** He was unaware of how much time had passed. Maybe a lot of time, it felt like weeks, or maybe years, had gone by now. The chaos inside his mind had calmed down drastically.  
  
And often enough he could feel either Tom or Voldemort barging their way inside his mind, but there was nothing to see there.  
  
He made sure of it. The horcrux inside of him had kept his distance, oddly enough. Only at times repeating that same sentence. ‘ _You’re Harry James Potter, born on 31 July 1980.’_ Harry had a feeling he needed the reminder, as he sometimes lost himself in the memories and his mind. But at the same time it seemed almost as if that part of Tom’s soul knew that he preferred to be alone now.  
  
Because the horcrux inside him didn’t approach him like the others did… Harry felt at least grateful for that. He already hated that he needed to keep two of him out at times. The diary horcrux more often, as he seemed more persistent.  
  
Through the passing of time Harry could finally place all of the memories in the right lives, mostly thanks to the horcrux. Yet the only two lives that were important for him were those of Hadrian and his current one, Harry.  
  
Harry started to realise that maybe him being reborn as Harry was a gift after all. He could reach Tom in ways that he couldn’t before. He could force… He didn’t like the thought of forcing anything on Tom, but he felt the need to make it right nonetheless.  
  
He would force Tom to absorb his horcruxes again. He felt like this was what he needed to do now. Despite still feeling betrayed by him Harry still wanted to protect him and make it right. A small feeling creeped upon him and Harry closed his eyes with a soft sight, letting him in.  
  
The blinding white light around him faded, revealing the sea. Peaceful and calm like always. As he remembered how often he had walked along this place or just sat here together with Tom. It seemed like a lifetime ago, which ironically it was…  
  
Harry didn’t react as he felt a presence behind him. “You’re a filthy liar…” He said when Tom kept silent behind him.  
  
A soft sigh could be heard behind him and Tom moved closer, walking past him and stopping in front of him. Harry blinked at him, not at all shocked or confused by the other’s appearance. Tom looked exactly like him… the unruly black hair and his features were exactly like his. It was as if he was staring in a mirror, with only one huge difference.  
  
The difference were their eyes. Toms were a vibrant red as they stared back at him. “Harry, I am so sorry.” Tom whispered softly and Harry could indeed see and feel the guilt coming from the horcrux inside him.  
  
He let out a soft snort at the apology. “Sorry…” Harry muttered. “Sorry isn’t going to fix this, Tom…”  
  
“I know…” Tom said as he closed his eyes. “I have been with you since…” Tom didn’t finish the sentence and Harry let out a cold, slightly insane, laugh, knowing that Tom couldn’t even say that he had tried to kill him.  
  
“Go ahead… Finish that sentence,” Harry snarled coldly. “I can’t even remember how often I tried to stop you from torturing or murdering… And you ended up trying to kill an innocent Child!” Harry screamed the last part as he shook his head, but both of them knew it was more Hadrian that was speaking now. “Prophecy or not, you should have known better… I… Angels are blinded.” Harry muttered then, his mind going over the entire place.  
  
“Harry...” Tom said as he reached out, but Harry took a step backwards, out of his reach. Green eyes narrowed and he felt the anger rush through him once more.  
  
“Don’t…. it is your fault I ended up like this… It is your fault I failed. This is all your goddam fault, Tom!” Harry screamed the last part and Tom closed his eyes with a pained expression.  
  
The silence that followed was uncomfortable, both of them lost in their own thoughts. “I can fix it…” Tom said then as those red eyes opened. “Let me help you. I can protect you from both of them. You wouldn’t need to stay in a coma forever and we can fix this.”  
  
Harry shook his head softly. “It would serve you right if I stayed like this…” Harry muttered, knowing how much it was actually hurting both Tom and Voldemort out there that he was in this state.  
  
Tom grew silent at those words. It was like a stab right through his heart and Harry knew it.  
  
“Tell me the truth then, Tom,” Harry started softly and Tom felt a flutter of hope at the other’s words. “Did they see Hadrian or did they see Harry?”  
  
Both of them were aware that Harry was asking more about the diary horcrux and not Voldemort himself. Because Harry knew that Voldemort had only ever seen Hadrian in him.  
  
“They… don’t see you, Harry. They only see Hadrian…” Tom replied softly. Harry wanted to say that he was lying, but deep down he knew the truth. “You know this is the truth… Deep down you know it. But even now you love him… me so much that you would be willing to live with this lie.”  
  
Harry kept quiet. It didn’t matter what he said. The horcrux inside of him was aware of his deepest thoughts and feelings. Though Harry was able to hide some of them from the horcrux. He could deny it, but then he would be the one lying and Tom would know.  
  
“I don’t know what to do anymore, Tom.” Harry admitted softly. Even now he wanted to save and protect Tom, no matter what. Hadrian’s feelings had been strong, to even survive through rebirth like this.  
  
Tom carefully took a step forward and extending his hand, looking deep into those green eyes. “You save me… Make me whole again,” Tom said softly. “Living with you has shown me more than I could ever understand, Harry.”  
  
Green eyes looked down at Tom’s hand, knowing if he took it, it would be all over. There would be no turning back till the end. A soul wasn’t meant to be destroyed and mending a broken soul was extremely painful.  
  
Harry met Tom’s eyes once more, wondering if he should see some form of doubt in them, but those red eyes were filled with determination. Tom would go on, risking it all in the process.  
  
Hadrian had so often tried to make Tom reabsorb the horcruxes, never had the dark wizard been willing. He always said no. This time however it was Tom himself that came up with it.  
  
“If we do this, we might both die…” Harry muttered, carefully looking at Tom’s eyes. A flicker of fear appeared in them.  
  
“You will be with me…?” Tom asked him softly.  
  
Harry nodded, looking saddened. “I promised, remember. I would always be with you, Tom. Always.”  
  
Harry raised his hand and grasped Tom’s in his. A deep sigh full of relief came out of Tom’s mouth as he pulled Harry against him. “I will protect you from them…” Tom promised him with a soft whisper near his ear, as he tightened his hold on Harry. “Till the end…”  
  
Harry blinked as he felt a thought go through his mind that wasn’t entirely his and he frowned, while he carefully embraced Tom back. Tom’s mind was focused on Harry’s invisibility cloak… The Deathly Hallows.  
  
Harry couldn’t stop the chocked laugh from escaping him and Tom’s lips turned upwards.  
  
“Till the end.” Harry muttered back at him, knowing that Tom wasn’t planning on letting either of them die.  
  
The sound of the waves faded into the distance and Harry awoke, his eyes however were a bright red. Slowly he got up and moved the body, which felt weak after being in one position for some time. And most likely because he had been living off on potions, instead of real food and liquid. It was enough to sustain the body, but it felt weak nonetheless. Harry’s body also felt quite different than his own Tom noticed.  
  
He shook his head as he focused, they needed to get out before the two other pieces of his soul realised that Harry was awake. Wards surrounded both the bed and the bedroom, placed by Voldemort himself.  
  
But the horcrux inside Harry had Voldemort’s knowledge as well and he easily unravelled them, without alerting either the diary horcrux or his main soul.  
  
_‘Where do we go first?’_ Harry asked inside his mind when Tom moved towards the window, stumbling slightly when the body protested. Tom bit through it as he forced the body to listen to him.    
  
_‘We start gathering the horcruxes. I think Little Hangleton first, for the ring. I think we better stay clear from Hogwarts for now however.’_ Tom thought back as he opened the window with slightly trembling hands and flew out. At least his magic worked fine and that was good, for they couldn’t stay there.    
  
Tom also couldn’t remember the last time wandless magic came so easy for him and he realised that he had indeed lost more than his soul when he created those horcruxes.  
  
_‘Agreed.’_ Harry replied back as Tom apparated away when he was outside of the wards. Tom stumbled again, dropping to his knees. ‘ _Are you alright?_ ’ Harry asked, sounding worried.  
  
_‘I need something to eat…’_ Tom groaned back into their mind.  
  
Harry laughed softly. ‘ _Take care of the body first then before you do anything else.’_  
  
Tom shook his head a bit, as he still felt lightheaded he forced himself up nonetheless.  
   
A graveyard that Harry had seen before during Tom’s life came into his view. The ring was hidden in that shack there…  
  
“You can’t exactly be seen in the wizarding world…”  Tom muttered out loud, seeing no one around him.  
  
_‘Glamour yourself and find something to eat, Tom,’_ Harry said back to him. _‘The ring can wait for now, you will be useless if you faint.’  
_  
Tom groaned, clearly irritated at this and applied a strong glamour over Harry’s body, making his hair a bit longer, to hide the famous scar.  
  
He flattened the hair over his forehead and apparated away again, landing near the Leaky cauldron, he once again dropped to his knees. “Damn it…” Tom cursed and Harry laughed softly, only making him more furious.  
  
“Are you alright, mate?” A voice sounded from somewhere in front of him and Tom glanced up, seeing a male muggle staring down at him.  
  
“Fine…” Tom replied back coldly as he got up, a bit shaky.  
  
“Ho there!” The muggle said as he caught him when Tom stumbled and almost felt again.  
  
Tom pushed him away with a growl, not wanting anyone to see him like this and he didn’t need the help. ‘ _Accept his help, Tom… Your… mine… uhh, our body is weak right now.’_ Harry muttered.  
  
Tom let out a small snort as Harry clearly didn’t know what to say about them sharing one body. Tom looked up at the muggle, who stared at him a bit apprehensively. He placed his hand atop the person’s arm and smiled charmingly, applying a bit of the Imperius Curse as he spoke. “Take me to your home. I need something to eat.”  
  
_‘Tom!!’_ Harry screamed inside their mind. Tom winced slightly as he heard the accusation in Harry’s voice. ‘ _Stop it this instant._ ’  
  
‘ _We need food Harry! This is a perfect way to get that and to stay clear from the wizarding world for now._ ’ Tom snarled back against him.  
  
_‘Tom Marvolo Riddle, I swear to God, release that spell!’_ Harry warned him and Tom could actually feel how angered this made Harry. ‘ _People have a free will and no one should temper with it, not even like this.’  
_  
Tom closed his eyes and grumbled softly. “Damn it all to hell.”  
  
_‘I will personally make sure you land in Hell, if you do not release that spell right now!’_ Harry said fiercely. ‘ _If you want to do things right, then do it right.’_ He added more softer this time. Tom thought that being Harry made Hadrian a bit more like a lion, exactly like a Gryffindor…  
  
Hadrian had never really raised his voice at him. His Guardian Angel had accused him of stuff before, but never like this. It was a good reminder that no matter what Harry was not really Hadrian. Harry was his own person and lived a different life. Besides that Harry was not some kind of angel, but a human. And humans were capable of more emotions than angels.  
  
Slightly displeased by this all Tom’s mouth became a thin line as he stared at the glazed look in the muggle’s eyes. He couldn’t believe this…  
  
The muggle would leave as soon as he released the spell and there would go their chance at free food… “I should remind you that we don’t have any money to buy food… how do you expect me to find something to eat!?” Tom hissed.  
  
Harry remained quiet and Tom knew that the other was thinking. ‘ _We will find something, but not like this, Tom…’  
  
_ Tom closed his eyes in defeat. “I swear you have a bad influence on me…” Tom muttered as he stopped the Imperius Curse and the muggle blinked, staring at him with a slightly confused look. Tom however quickly erased the other’s mind.  
  
Harry laughed inside their mind and said. ‘ _Well, you have been stuck with me since I was one year and three months.’_ Tom inwardly winced at it. Harry however seemed to ignore it and Tom felt like the other was doing this on purpose, making him feel guilty for what he had done…  
  
“Oh…” The muggle male said softly. “Are you sure you are alright, mate?” The blonde muggle asked then and Tom focused on him.  
   
‘ _Tell him that you haven’t eating in a while…_ ’ Harry supplied inside their mind. Tom followed his advice this time, seeing if somehow the muggle would still offer their help like Harry was expecting would happen.  
  
“I have not eating anything in a while honestly.” Tom said softly, eyeing the muggle carefully.  
  
The blonde male’s eyes widened. “Oh…” The black eyes looked over his body and then frowned. “You look like you are clearly malnourished…” Tom didn’t like the way those eyes roamed over Harry’s body and he could feel Harry was amused by it.  
  
“I live near here, I could give you a sandwich or a toast or anything,” The muggle said and then seemed to remember himself, as he extended his hand in greeting. “Ah, right. My name is Andrew.”  
  
Tom accepted it with a small nod. “Harry.” He said and he could feel Harry’s confusion inside of him, but ignored it for now.  
  
Andrew walked in front of them, walking slowly and glancing sideways pretty often, almost as if making sure that Tom wouldn’t trip.  
  
As they reached an apartment building Tom felt relieved, because he was certain that his body could not take more. The light-headedness had increased and Andrew guided him towards the couch as he dropped down on it. He closed his eyes, letting his head rest against the back of the couch as he breathed in and out deeply.  
  
“You certain you are alright?” Andrew asked him, sounding worried. “Should I get your parents or anyone…?”  
  
Tom blinked his eyes open and only then remembered that Harry was looking like a 14 year old… well shit.  
  
“No, I don’t have parents.” Tom quickly said, as Harry also felt slightly uncomfortable. Andrew seemed sad as he made his way to the kitchen, saying he would prepare something for him.  
  
“Any other relatives then?” The voice asked out of the kitchen.  
  
“No, I kind of ran away…” Tom whispered, knowing that the muggle would most likely hear it anyway.  
  
“You’re living on the streets…” Andrew said shocked as he walked back inside and handed him a plate with a toast and some cheese on it.  
  
“Basically. I can take care of myself,” Tom said as he accepted the plate. “Thanks.” He added rather coldly, when Harry muttered about being polite.     
  
“You said your name was Harry… what about your last name?” Andrew asked softly and Tom glanced up at him as he took a small bite of the toast.  
  
“None of your business.” Tom said sharply and Andrew’s eyes widened a bit.  
  
“You ran away and have been living on the streets, you are only a child!” Andrew exclaimed shocked. “You should at least be in an orphanage or somewhere-.” Andrew never could finish that sentence as it felt like his air supply was cut off by some invisible force.  
  
Harry screamed his name inside their mind, but Tom only glared furious at the muggle for even daring to say something like that. Never would he go back to an orphanage. Tom took a deep breath and calmed down as he put a strong sleeping spell on the muggle, who just fell asleep on the couch next to him.  
  
Harry got silent and Tom focused quietly on eating the toast. Afterwards he felt a bit better at having something inside his stomach.  
  
_‘That was not necessary.’_ Harry muttered softly, but Harry also knew how deeply Tom resented his time at the orphanage, so he knew he couldn’t exactly blame him either.    
  
“He should have kept his mouth shut then.” Tom snarled as he made his way to the kitchen and filled a glass with water, drinking it slowly. His strength returning a bit. Tom leaned on the counter as he closed his eyes.  
  
‘ _We should rest up before doing anything else…_ ’ Harry said and Tom silently agreed. Tomorrow they might be a bit better and then they could get the ring and the other horcruxes.  
  
Tom made sure that Andrew remained asleep for the whole day, hoping that no muggles would notice him missing somewhere and he had no important appointments.  
  
Some time passed and in the evening a small shiver went through Tom and Harry.  
  
Tom chuckled lowly and strengthened the wards around them, just a small precaution. Voldemort had clearly found out about Harry being missing.  
  
Harry could feel it as well and was relieved when Tom easily blocked the Dark Lord out. He made sure that around him were wards that made it impossible to track them down.  
  
It was at that point that Harry truly knew that the horcrux inside him was serious. This part of Tom’s soul was effectively making sure that neither Voldemort nor Tom could find him. Tom was protecting him, knowing that he didn’t quite want to deal with them yet.  
  
Not that Harry wanted to deal with the horcrux inside him either, but at least this soul piece of Tom promised to help him. The horcrux inside of him wanted to restore his soul, something that Hadrian had argued with him about so often.  
  
Therefor Harry could at least accept this Tom better than the two others who had straight out lied to him.   


* * *

  
Gone… Harry was gone. Tom stared at the bed, still full of disbelief. If Harry had somehow woken up, he wouldn’t have just left them? Left _him_ right?  
  
Tom tightened his grip on the wand in his hand, eyes full of fury as he swirled around to glare at his other self. “This is your entire fault!” He snarled at him and the raised his wand, casting a killing curse.  
  
Voldemort recovered from the shock and disappeared, evading the green deathly spell. Tom turned towards him as he felt him appear near him. Theirs wands were pointed at each other, but neither casting any spell yet.  
  
Those red eyes were cold, but hidden somewhere deep down Tom could see immense guilt and he laughed at that. “You know you are to blame for this.” Tom said in a strangled voice. The thought of losing Harry was something he still couldn’t quite process. It made him remember the day that Harry had fallen off his broom during that Quidditch match and he felt scared…  
  
“I lost him before…” Voldemort muttered, lowering his wand. “I can’t lose him again.”  
  
Voldemort sounded hurt and lost and so weak, that it made Tom cringe. Yet at the same time he understood his main soul perfectly. For he felt the same. “Find him then!” Tom screamed, knowing that Voldemort knew a lot of spells, surely there would be one that could locate Harry.  
  
Determination flared in those red-slitted eyes. There was no place Harry could hide from them. “Come. I know a spell that should be able to track him.” Voldemort stated as he moved out of the bedroom.  
  
Tom followed him. His heart was still beating hard, as he simply refused to believe this. All this time he had been watching Harry in his coma like state and now the boy had simply gotten up and left. Voldemort had said that eventually most test subjects woke up again after some time, but the shortest amount of period was 6 months.  
  
Those test subjects had their memories of their previous lives restored, meaning that if Harry was awake now, he had all of Hadrian’s memories… and those before that, but those lives were not of any importance to them.  
  
The strangest part was that Harry had woken up way sooner. A mere 2 months… it was impossible if what Voldemort had said about the potion was true. Tom knew that the Dark Lord hadn’t lied about it. So Tom couldn’t help but feel like something had happened…  
  
Tom followed Voldemort into the ritual room that was inside the manor and watched as the Dark Lord drew a rune circle that he recognized as a very dark and strong tracking spell. He briefly frowned at it. Never had he considered he would use this kind of spell. Voldemort however didn’t seem to be bothered with it.  
  
During the past two months that Harry had been in a coma Tom had found out how deep his main soul had fallen into the dark arts and how messed up he had become. He was the first horcrux, but there were few others out there and Tom didn’t want to think about it at all.  
  
Immortality was important for him. He didn’t want to die after all, but was it really necessary to tear his soul apart so many times… He had considered creating more horcruxes, but seeing how his main soul had ended up. He honestly doubted if it had been the right decision.  
  
Tom stepped away as Voldemort raised his wand and cut his palm open, dropping his blood in the middle of the rune circle. He chanted the spell in Latin and Tom watched as white smoke come from the red liquid. However it never showed a place or a scene, like it should do.  
  
The white smoke remained white and Tom knew that somehow the spell had failed. Voldemort became tense also seeing this. The spell was being blocked…  
  
Voldemort stopped his chant and the smoke faded away. Tom remained quiet as he stared at the other’s rigid back. The silence and the tension felt heavy and Tom closed his eyes, as he turned around and left the room, before Voldemort would finally lose his calm.  
  
It was as Tom walked down the hallway that an enormous blast sounding through Slytherin manor. He just walked on, ignoring the dark magic that he could feel coming from the ritual room that was now probably destroyed.  
  
He walked into the bedroom and wondered what must have gone through Harry’s mind to just leave like this. He sat down and rolled the wand in his hand through his fingers, Harry’s wand. It felt so familiar, like his wand. This wasn’t odd considering their wands had the same core.  
  
It could be considered sweet in a way. They were soulmates and they had brother wands. Yet at this point Tom wanted nothing more than have Harry close near him again.  
  
He would find him, even if no spell could locate or track him, Tom wouldn’t give up. He braced himself and apparated away.  
  
He wouldn’t waste his time in misery like this. He would search all over the world to find Harry.  


* * *

  
  
Voldemort sat on his knees, feeling how his magic still circled around him. Destructive in its nature. He wanted to let go of it, to lose control completely…  
  
 He wanted to forget all those moments together with Hadrian. He wanted to forget about Harry saying those words that damned him. _‘I warned you. I told you… a human’s mind is not capable of handling so many memories…’_  
  
Yet Voldemort couldn’t forget. Even his 16-year old self had said he deserved this suffering. Maybe he did… how many times had Hadrian told him that what he was doing was wrong. And every time he ignored his Guardian angel’s well-meant advice.  
  
And now.. he had tried to kill Hadrian, Harry, two times in a way. And after that he handed the young child a potion that could easily break a person’s mind. All because he _needed_ to know… How could he ever forgive himself for it?  
  
Red eyes closed, as he fought back his tears. He wouldn’t cry… He had gone years without crying, even when Hadrian had left so suddenly he had not cried. He had been furious, yes, but he had never cried…  
  
But he couldn’t stop it this time… A small sob escaped him and before he knew it, he was crying in earnest.  Every emotion he had bottled up inside of him got out and he couldn’t stop it. His magic reacted on his strong emotions. It whipped around him, tearing down the walls and the ceiling was blasted upwards.  
  
Harry had woken up… but it was clear that he had no wish to be found. Still… Voldemort could not let him get away, not like this. He needed to find him, to see him. For if he found Harry then this time he would also find Hadrian.  
  
He would finally have his angel back and he pulled himself together as teary red eyes opened, filled with new-found determination. He would not let Hadrian get away from him. Not ever again.

The day after the rest they decided to take, their body felt a bit better and Tom knew it was time to leave and gather the horcruxes. They couldn’t afford to waste too much time, knowing that the other two were now also aware that Harry was gone.  
  
Tom apparated them away after waking up Andrew and making sure that the muggle didn’t remember anything about this encounter. They once again landed in the familiar graveyard and Tom quickly made his way to a small shack, where both of them knew the ring was hidden.  
  
Once again the wards were easily dismantled and Tom also removed the curse he had placed on the ring, as he put it on Harry’s finger. ‘ _Where to now then? The diadem is out of our reach. I think the school has started and we don’t have my invisibility cloak.’_ Harry said.  
  
Tom hummed softly. ‘ _We need it though and I think we should also need to look for the other Deathly Hallows.’  
_  
Harry sighed and Tom chuckled. ‘ _Still planning on deceiving death.’_ Harry muttered, feeling like he was failing a bit again.  
  
Tom laughed softly as he walked past the graves. _‘Nope, this time I will become the Master of Death. No need to deceive it then.’  
_  
Harry snorted at that. ‘ _Well good luck with that, Tom.’_ Harry said. His voice filled with sarcasm, but Harry already knew something that Tom didn’t. Right now they already held the resurrection stone and Tom was simply unaware of it, like he always had been… Still Harry decided to keep this to himself for now.    
  
_‘Why thank you, my dear Harry._ ’ Tom said back as he apparated away again. This time he landed the cave where the locket was hidden.  
  
_‘Your dear Harry?’_ Harry questioned him, but both were amused by this and Tom smiled.  
  
“Yes,” He said out loud. “You were my guardian angel before, this time I will be yours.”  
  
Harry grew silent, but Tom could feel that Harry appreciated it. ‘ _Thank you, Tom,_ ’ Harry whispered and then continued on when he realised where they were. ‘ _You can’t drink that potion yourself, Tom…’  
_  
Tom winced, knowing that was true. ‘ _Well I could find some unfortunate muggle, but I know you would not approve…’_ Andrew came to mind, but Tom forced the thought away.  
  
_‘I will approve if you chose to use Voldemort.’_ Harry replied back and Tom’s eyes widened at that. _‘Kidding…’_ Harry said and Tom closed his eyes with a relieved sigh.  
  
“Well… I guess we can’t reach the locket either then. And I believe Nagini is currently off limits as well.” Tom muttered out loud.  
  
Harry sighed. ‘ _So what do we do then?’_    
  
“We go get your cloak for now. I suspect that Sirius kept it in your bedroom,” Tom said as he apparated away again. “We need your wand as well, but I assume Voldemort has it. Maybe after they both have calmed down we could go get it.”  
  
‘ _You are doing pretty well without my wand._ ’ Harry stated.  
  
“Yes, but a wand makes it easier to use our magic, Harry. If it should come down to a duel then I would prefer to fight with a wand.” Tom said.  
  
_‘You know that might be a suicide mission to get back inside Slytherin manor and find my wand.’_ Harry said.  
  
“Well, what do we have to lose anyway?” Tom asked as he walked through the empty street. It was raining a bit and he stopped near Grimmauld Place, seeing that the wards still would recognise him. That was at least an advantage.  
  
Yet without knowing if either Remus Lupin or Sirius Black was inside, he couldn’t risk entering the house. So they patiently waited for now.  
  
A strong Disillusionment charm on him was making sure that he couldn’t be seen. When evening came the lights were turned on inside the house and Harry hummed seeing it.  
  
‘ _They are home…_ ’ Harry muttered inside their mind and Tom withheld a sigh.  
  
‘ _We wait…_ ’ Tom said back to him as he simply sat down on the edge of the sidewalk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly I added a lot of stuff to this chapter and it became much longer than I had anticipated... 
> 
> Lucius writing in the diary for example and the scene with the muggle also was added afterwards. Anyway hope you all liked it and cya next update :)!


	3. Salazar Slytherin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New school year at Hogwarts has started and the Triwizard Tournament is being held at the castle. Sirius Black becomes the new DADA teacher and everyone misses Harry. 
> 
> Harry and the horcrux inside of him end up in the Chamber of Secret to hide away for the Diary horcrux and Voldemort. It is in there that they talk to Salazar Slytherin. 
> 
> While the Diary horcrux relays Harry's sudden disappearance to Sirius Black and Remus Lupin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3 major updates on one day… Now I am going to take a small break XD… (though expect ‘Offer of Immortality’ to be updated later this week, since that chapter is close to being finished as well.)
> 
> This chapter took different turns than I had expected when I started to write it XD. But it is finally finished.  
> Hope you all enjoy and all mistakes are still my own!!

### Chapter 3:

**Hogwarts, 1 September 1994:**

“This year, we have the honour of hosting the Triwizard Tournament.” Dumbledore started his opening speech, staring at all the students sitting inside the Great Hall.  
  
The Gryffindors were silent and a heavy air hung around them, which didn’t go unnoticed by the other houses. It was no secret that during the Quidditch World cup, the famous Harry Potter had been kidnapped, but this time, everyone seemed to really take notice of it.  
  
Albus could only hope the young boy was somehow alive and well. They searched and searched, but it was as if Harry Potter had vanished into thin air after the kidnapping. The Ministry was also at a loss and Albus feared that Harry was beyond strong wards and he had his speculations about who was the one keeping the young child away. That is if Voldemort had not killed Harry already…  
  
Albus didn’t dare look at Severus, whose Dark Mark had returned that same fateful night. It was proof that Voldemort was out there, yet he kept hidden, not even calling his followers to him. At least Severus hadn’t been called… Albus didn’t know if other Death Eaters had been summoned.   
  
This only made things worse, for it meant that they had no information whatsoever on Harry… And it didn’t sit right with him that he had never found Tom Riddle’s diary either. It could be that the diary had something to do with it all. That part of Tom’s soul had been resurrected all along and he simply had not known about it. Without a doubt if that had happened the soul piece inside the diary had found the main soul and revived him.  
  
It was a terrifying idea that there might be more horcruxes out there and who knows how many are sentient and capable of doing damage like the diary had done nearly two years ago. Albus inwardly sighed, knowing that right now he could do nothing about it. His students were counting on him and he couldn’t let any more of them down.  
  
“The tournament is renewed this year. Both Durmstrang and Beauxbatons will attend it as well and they will travel all over the world to come to Hogwarts.” Albus went on, seeing that now some of the students looked up, clearly intrigued or curious now.  
  
“This year, because of the dangers of the tournament and the high death toll it had in the past, there will be certain rules. No one below 17 will be allowed to attend,” Albus said gravely, as he looked at all of them. “I hope that when Durmstrang and Beauxbatons arrive here, that you will gave them a warm welcome.”  
  
Silence filled the room and Albus scrapped his throat as he gestured sideways to the new defence against the dark arts teacher. “This year Sirius Black will be our defence against the dark arts teacher.”  
  
Sirius stood up and made a small bow, as several students clapped. The Slytherins didn’t seem moved at all. Sirius sat back down, with a rather haunted look in his eyes.  
  
Albus knew he could do not much for the young wizard at this point. He just hoped to keep the others mind occupied, while the rest of the order continued to search for Harry.   
  
Sirius Black had blamed himself the most for what happened that evening and in this way he might be occupied and don’t do anything stupid. Remus had also pushed for him to take the new position of Defence against the Dark Arts and eventually Sirius had relented, reluctantly still.  
  
Albus believed it might be good for Sirius to be teaching. Sirius’s mind healer had agreed as well, saying that Sirius should not think about his guilt or Harry 24/7. Though this would be rather difficult. “Enjoy the feast.” Albus said, as he raised his hands and food appeared all over the tables.  
  
Hermione looked at Ron who sat in front of her, but even the redhead didn’t seem hungry as he picked at the food he put on his plate. Harry’s capture by those death eaters had hit in hard.  
  
After that attack however, it had been silent, way too silent. Hermione had a terrible feeling that she couldn’t quite place. She often glanced at Luna during the opening speech, hoping that the strange blond girl knew more about Harry’s disappearance, but her silver eyes seemed focused now, though sadness radiated from the normally bright girl.  
  
Luna hardly spoke to her housemates and was avoiding eye contact with everyone. It only made Hermione’s suspicions far worse. Harry and Luna had been close last year and the blond girl seemed to also miss the other’s presence.  
  
Or was there something else on her mind? Hermione didn’t know and reluctantly started to eat something as well. It should be a fun year, but without Harry here, something just felt completely wrong…  
 

* * *

  
Luna hummed softly, a sad kind of tune. The other Ravenclaws knew she had befriended Harry Potter and that was the reason for her mood change.  
  
Luna however was thinking on what could possibly happen. Gabriel, Michael and Ariel, her guardian angel, had warned her that things would start changing soon. It was only a matter of time now. Yet she was worried about Harry nonetheless. She knew without a doubt that Tom, the soul piece inside Harry, would never hurt him.  
  
For the angels told her that the horcrux inside Harry was trying to make it all right. Harry was also going to try and fix Tom’s soul, but the biggest problem they would face was no doubt Voldemort.  
  
Gabriel said that even at the end of it Voldemort would not want to absorb the horcruxes, even Harry would not be able to persuade him.  
  
Silver eyes closed, her ears tuning out the noise around her and her focus went inward. She hated this… the not knowing and the knowing. Sometimes she preferred not to know.  
  
Sadly… Gabriel had explained to her that it was going to hurt if Harry would force Tom’s soul together again. It would be extremely painful, even might end up killing Tom in the process. And not just killing, but Tom’s whole unstable soul could be completely destroyed. Harry would not let this happen, but in the end, everything depended upon Tom himself.  
  
Luna just hoped that Harry would get through to him and that Tom would really regret everything he had done. Luna just hoped that Harry would get through to him and that Tom would really regret everything he had done. And she hoped that both of them would come out alive. Fate couldn’t be so cruel to kill one of them, could it? Yet she knew the possible outcomes… She hoped that if they did die that their next lives would be much better.  
  
 She opened her eyes and stared at the food on her plate…   
  
There was nothing that she could do right now. She could only wait and see how things would turn out and in this moment she cursed her gift, because knowing it all was more devastating than ever.    
  
Her eyes glanced up at the Slytherin table and she saw Draco Malfoy staring at his plate, unusually pale, but he talked and laughed at times, as not to arise too much suspicion, but it was clear that the young Malfoy’s thoughts were elsewhere.  
  
Luna knew what had really occurred. Lucius Malfoy’s death had been sudden and Narcissa Malfoy had stated it had been a heart attack. The truth however was much worse and the secret was kept inside the Malfoy family.  
  
Both Narcissa and Draco were terrified for their lives and Luna couldn’t blame them… Deep down she hoped that Harry would not take too much time on gathering all the horcruxes if he woke up…  
  
Her eyes shifted towards the head table and she saw Sirius Black, staring at the Gryffindor table. Sirius was already lost in the lies and secrets of the young Dark Lord. When the truth would be revealed about Tom’s true origin, Sirius would be devastated.  
  
Of course Sirius Black was already aware of what Tom was capable of, since Tom had tortured Wormtail, but still Sirius was blissfully unaware of whom Tom truly was. Luna guessed that sometimes being unaware of stuff was far easier and she let out a deep sigh. She missed Harry a lot…

* * *

  
Sirius merely stared at all the students that he would be soon teaching. It felt strange sitting here on the head table, while years ago he had sat there on the Gryffindor table with James, Remus and Peter and later on Lily.  
  
How everything had changed. The war had torn them apart and now Harry was in Voldemort’s hands somehow. Tom had told and showed them that much, but they had made a vow to not let Albus or anyone else know about it, until Tom gave his permission for it.  
  
If Sirius had known the gravity of the whole situation he might have never agreed to such terms. Tom explained to them, after they had taken a vow, that Harry was in some kind of coma state now, but he was busy trying to reach him.  
  
They had argued at first that Tom should just get Harry away from there, but the teenager had explained that it would go wrong if he did that. Voldemort would be furious and most likely lose the little control and sanity he had.  
  
If that were to happen, Tom reasoned that the Dark Lord would attack everyone, just too somehow gather information about Harry’s whereabouts, not caring if he killed anyone in the process.  
  
Still it didn’t ease the worry that Sirius felt. Tom often enough showed them memories of Harry, but the small boy remained asleep in everyone one of them.  
  
It was cruel… Sirius wanted nothing more than to find out where Voldemort was hiding Harry, but there was no way. Tom promised them at least he was taken care of.  
  
Sirius closed his eyes. The young teenager had told him that he should accept the DADA position for now, as it would be a good idea to keep his mind of Harry for the time being. If anything were to go wrong, Tom would let them know immediately.  
  
Strangely enough Sirius knew that when it came to Harry, they could trust Tom. Because in some of the memories that Tom had showed them, Tom actually had fought against Voldemort and thrown him out of the bedroom in which Harry was lying.  
  
Sirius and Remus had briefly speculated on why Tom was so close to Voldemort as well, but they didn’t get any answers and when they had asked, Tom had stated that he preferred not to talk about it at all.  
  
So they dropped the subject, but still it was one of the many questions haunted through his mind. Yet Sirius trusted Tom, because he had seen that the teenager was just as distressed about it all as he was. It was proof that Tom cared deeply for Harry as well.

* * *

  
**Grimmauld Place, 16 September 1994:**  
As Tom and Harry sat there on the sidewalk, Tom heard Harry start to hum a familiar melody.  
  
_‘Harry…’_ He said irritated in their mind and Harry stopped humming immediately.  
  
_‘Sorry, I always liked that melody.’_ Harry whispered back and Tom let out a small sigh. He preferred to forget anything about the orphanage, but he knew Hadrian had always liked the melody. They often hummed it for the younger children, though Tom had no memory of one of the caretakers actually humming it to him.    
  
_‘I know…’_ Tom said softly back to him.  
  
The lights inside were still on inside the house and Harry wondered briefly what Sirius and maybe Remus were doing still awake. It was already getting pretty late after all.  
  
_‘Harry…’_ Tom started softly and Harry could hear the reluctant tone the other had about broaching this subject. Harry also preferred not to talk about it, but he also knew that they couldn’t keep postponing it.  
  
_‘Yes?_ ’ Harry asked him and Tom sighed heavily inside their mind.  
  
‘ _You still haven’t forgiving me, have you?_ ’ Tom inquired softly.  
  
_‘How could I forgive you? After everything you have done, Tom…’_ Harry whispered back softly. _‘I admire you, at least this part of you, because you are trying to change and make it right again.’_  
  
Tom remained silent, as his red eyes still gazed towards the house. Harry continued and Tom listened to his every word. _‘You have made many mistakes; it is only now that I see them for what they truly are. As Hadrian… I could see them, I guess, but I closed my eyes for all your faults. I love you so much that I will indeed be willing to live in a lie, Tom.’  
_  
To hear Harry admit that to him made something inside him break. Red eyes closed. He wanted to apologize once more, but like Harry had said before, sorry wasn’t going to fix anything.  
  
Without a doubt both Voldemort and the diary soul piece were worried sick about Harry. Tom slowly opened his eyes again and both of them were silent.  
  
Until Harry started to hum the tune once more. This time Tom kept silent and let him, almost like this was his punishment for everything he had done wrong. He also deserved every kind of torture Harry would throw at him.  
  
Harry stopped humming immediately as a small crack sounded close by and Tom looked up to find the source of the apparating sound.  
  
16-year old Tom Riddle stood there, cloaked in a long robe that could easily be seen as a long coat.  
  
Harry saw how the 16-year old looked around and them carefully made his way towards the Black house, knocking the young dark lord glanced over his shoulder, those dark eyes scanning the street.  
  
‘ _Can he feel our presence somehow?_ ’ Harry asked him softly and Tom shook his head.  
  
_‘No, he is merely careful or more like paranoid.’_ The horcrux inside him replied and Harry hummed softly.  
  
The door opened and light made its way out of the hallway. Harry saw that it was not Sirius who opened the door, but Remus. Remus had his wand pointed at the person standing in front of the door.  
  
They were clearly speaking but because of the distance Tom and Harry couldn’t hear what was being said. _‘I guess the cloak is out of reach now as well…’_ Harry muttered softly, as Remus took a step backwards and Tom Riddle moved inside.  
  
_‘Seems like it.’_ Tom replied coldly. Harry laughed softly, knowing that Tom was feeling irritated that nothing went according to plan. And the fact that it was his 16-year old soul part that so easily had destroyed their plan made it even worse.  
  
‘ _Let’s go somewhere else for now._ ’ Harry said.  
  
_‘Where do you suggest? It seems like they are going to search for us.’_ Tom replied back and just as he finished that sentence a powerful wave of magic went through him.  
  
_‘Tom!’_ Harry screamed as the other grabbed his head and let out a pained groan. Magic circled around them and in his desperation Tom apparated away from that spot. Immediately it eased down a bit, as Tom slumped down on the ground, panting for breath. ‘ _Are you alright?’_ Harry asked in a shocked voice.  
  
Tom’s eyes were wide and he couldn’t stop the insane laugh from escaping him. Voldemort had tried a far darker locating spell and it had taken him by surprise. If only he had reacted one second later Voldemort might have found out their location, but because he had disappeared from that particular spot Voldemort’s spell had been useless.  
  
Harry remained quiet, also knowing how far the others were willing to go to find him. This spell was dark in its own nature and dangerous for both parties involved. It showed how desperate Voldemort was and Harry could feel that Tom was tired, but they couldn’t stay here. ‘ _Tom… you need to move.’_  
  
Red eyes blinked opened slowly as he took in his surroundings. The trees closing them in around them seemed familiar to Harry. Tom answered his unasked question as he finally got a hold on himself. ‘ _The forbidden forest.’_  
  
  _‘What are we doing here?’_ Harry asked him curiously. This was far too close to Hogwarts.    
  
_‘I guess this might be one of the last places they will search, Harry._ ’ Tom replied back inside their mind, as he slowly got up and walked through the forest. He sought for a sign, to know where they were and found one when he noticed a clearing with a lake in it.  
  
_‘It’s beautiful…’_ Harry whispered in awe remembering seeing it before as Hadrian. They saw some fireflies or maybe faeries floating above the lake, moving almost like in a dance.  
  
_‘It is,’_ Tom replied back, red eyes fixed on the small light orbs that moved around. _‘The positive side to this is that maybe the wards of Hogwarts will also block more of Voldemort’s attempts to locate us.’  
_  
Harry agreed as Tom moved forward. Now knowing where he was he made his way to the place he needed to go. Harry remained quiet, knowing that Tom was planning on hiding down inside the Chamber of Secrets for the time being.  
  
‘ _We do need food and water to survive, Tom._ ’ Harry told him.  
  
‘ _Don’t worry about it. We can find something soon, besides I am thinking that since we are desperate for money, because money could buy us food. How about a trip to Gringotts next?’_ Tom said as he leaned down and opened the small hatch that would bring them to the Chamber.  
  
Harry laughed, knowing that actually stepping inside the wizarding bank would be insane. _‘You’re impossible.’_ Tom’s lips curved upwards as they reached the inside and he looked up at the giant statue of Salazar Slytherin. It felt like years since he stood here, but in truth he had been here when Harry had met his arrogant 16-year old self, which had only been like 2 years ago.  
  
_‘Tom…’_ Harry said softly as he felt the other being pulled inside his memories.  
  
Tom closed his eyes. ‘ _I know you killing Myrtle was nothing more than an accident…’_ Harry continued on and Tom could note the hint of sadness in the other’s voice.  
  
‘ _It was…’_ Tom replied as he moved towards the statue and commanded it to open. Myrtle had just been at the wrong place and wrong time…  
  
The basilisk slid out and down in front of him, as Tom focused on the here and now once more. The king of the serpents, a name deserving of the creature in front of them.  
  
Tom moved forward and placed his hand atop the basilisks head. “ _Hello, my dear serpent_.” Tom hissed at it and the basilisk let out a small hiss that sounded almost happy.  
  
“ _Master…_ ” She nudged his hand and with a fond smile he walked past her and climbed atop of the great serpent.  
  
_“Bring me up, into the Chambers of Salazar himself.”_ Tom ordered the snake as it reared its head up and glided easily to the small opening, while Tom leaned his body down completely, having done this before many times in the past.  
  
As they reached the inside of the Chambers Tom let himself slide down and eyed the room, red eyes falling upon a portrait of Salazar himself, who eyed him warily in return.  
  
“Well, what do we have here?” Salazar asked as those eyes regarded him rather coldly. “Family of Tom Riddle I assume. A cousin or anything that he had no knowledge of? Only parselmouths are able to enter my room after all.”  
  
“No family, Salazar. I am Tom Riddle.” Tom replied as he walked and stopped in front of the painting. Salazar’s eyes widened briefly.  
  
“Oh boy, what have you done…? I warned you that somehow you would pay the price.” Salazar said while he shook his head, clearly disappointed.  
  
“I know… I am going to fix it however.” Tom replied and he could hear Harry agree with Salazar’s words.  
  
Salazar crossed his arms over his chest, glaring down at the small boy in front of him. “Well, you look like a 13 year old boy.”  
  
“14.” Tom corrected him, which only made Salazar sigh and Harry laugh.    
  
“It does not matter what you current age is. What have you done, Tom Marvolo Riddle?” Salazar hissed out, finally furious. “You succeeded in splitting your soul multiple times I assume?” Tom gave a small nod and Salazar sighed.  “I heard some rumours, when I went out and visited other portraits, but I didn’t dare believe them and you never returned either…” Salazar eyed him critically then. “You’re a horcrux, aren’t you?”  
  
Tom nodded gravely. “He created 7 horcruxes. I am one of them, split when he tried to kill Harry James Potter.”  
  
Salazar’s eyes widened. “By Merlin… The-Boy-Who-Lived is a living horcrux… he is still alive?” Salazar leaned forward, clearly intrigued by it.  
  
“He is. Harry is alive inside of this body right now. I am merely in control.” Tom said, as he waved his hand and a chair appeared. He sat down upon it, knowing this might take some time.  
  
“Can he also control the body?” Salazar questioned him and Tom shrugged not knowing if Harry could or wanted it. Harry had seemed content in letting him go collect everything they needed after all.  
  
_‘Harry?’_ Tom asked him and Salazar noticed that those red eyes gained a far-away look.  
  
_‘It is still my body, so I guess that is a yes. Besides my soul is whole, while yours is a mere sliver. I would easily be able to control you and push you back.’_ Harry stated.  
  
Tom grew silent at those words and then looked up at Salazar. “He is able to control the body as well, easier than I ever could, because it is his body and his soul is whole unlike mine.”  
  
Salazar nodded. “Can I see it?” Salazar asked them and Tom wanted to pull back and ask Harry, but all of a sudden he felt a force push him back and lock him away in the same place where he had been for 12 years… Harry had taken control quite easily and locked him away… A flare of anger went through him, but Harry ignored it completely.  
  
Salazar saw those red eyes shift from fiery red to bright green. “Hello Salazar Slytherin, nice to finally meet you.” Harry said with a smile.  
  
“Impressive…” Salazar muttered. “Two souls in one body.”  
  
“Not two souls, since Tom’s soul is only a sliver of his,” Harry corrected. “But right now this Tom inside of me is going to help me find the other horcruxes and fix his soul.”  
  
Salazar gave a small nod. “I think that is for the best, one horcrux is alright, but creating more. I think Tom became quite unstable. I could hardly believe the young teenager I had once known had attempted to kill a young born.”  
  
Harry gave a sad nod, also not believing that Tom had fallen so deeply. A wave of guilt went through him coming from the horcrux inside him, but Harry ignored that as well.  
  
Tom wanted to apologize once more, but he remained quiet, knowing that words were meaningless at this point.  
  
Salazar sighed deeply, shaking his head. “Well, it is good that you are planning on helping him. He certainly needs all the help he can get.”  
  
“Yes, he does. Don’t worry about him. I will make sure that he will do nothing so stupid ever again.” Harry said. His voice strong and unwavering and Salazar chuckled lowly.  
  
“Tom Riddle isn’t exactly the type of person to listen to someone else.” Salazar said with a grin on his face that showed how intrigued and amused the founder was.  
  
Harry merely smiled at him, as he felt Tom pull further away, hiding away almost embarrassed by it all. “I guess I will be the one and only exception,” Harry said and Salazar raised his eyebrow, clearly confused. “I can handle him, I promise you that.”  
  
Salazar gave a small nod, but didn’t seem at ease with it either. “What brought the two of you here?” The founder asked him.  
  
“Running away from Tom’s 16-year old self and the main soul, who are both searching for us at the moment.” Harry replied.  
  
“I see… The soul he put in his diary is revived?” Salazar questioned with a frown and Harry nodded.  
  
“Yes, I am not sure how, but I guess someone must have died in the process… I know for a fact if I hadn’t met young Tom in the chamber that moment, he would have drained Ginny Weasley’s soul. I can only assume he now drained someone else’s soul.” Harry said softly, not liking the idea that someone died.  
  
_‘I think we shouldn’t worry about that for the time being, Harry. We have more pressing matters right now.’_ Tom said inside his mind and Harry agreed.  
  
“Right… What do we do now?” Harry questioned him. “We can’t exactly walk into Gringotts either, even if you said that.”  
  
_‘Yes, we can. The Goblins won’t care for it. The only problem is that you have no key to your vault and neither do I for mine…’_ Tom said.  
  
Harry pursed his lips and shook his head. Green eyes looked up at the portrait in front of him and his eyes widened as he had a sudden thought. Tom also quickly picked up on Harry’s thoughts and a small chuckle sounded inside Harry’s mind.  
  
_‘Clever… house-elves are underestimated, but they are loyal nonetheless,’_ Tom said, praising him for his idea. ‘ _Give me back control over the body.’_  
  
Harry smiled and Salazar frowned at his strange behaviour. “Nice meeting you, Mr. Slytherin. Maybe we will talk again one day.”  
  
The founder gave a small nod and Harry let Tom take back control. “No need to be so formal towards him, Harry,” Tom sighed, as Salazar chuckled. Then he got up and called out a name. “Mipsy!” Just as expected the house-elf appeared, since her master had called her.  
  
“Master!” The house-elf exclaimed and bowed her head deeply.  
  
“Listen well, no matter what your other masters say,” Tom said in a cold voice and the house-elf looked up with slightly frightened eyes. “You will not let him know where I am or who I am exactly. From now on you listen to me and no more punishments for you.”  
  
Mipsy eagerly nodded her head and Tom smiled briefly. “I want three meals a day, delivered to this place until I let you know when I move out of here. Also I want information about what happened the last months inside the manor.”  
  
“Yes, master!” Mipsy said and then started to explain everything. How a blond male, both Harry and Tom instantly knew it must be Lucius Malfoy, had been forced to write in a small black book. She also said that the dark-haired teenager that came to live with them was much nicer, but that both had become distressed a day ago, when the body of Harry Potter had disappeared.

When Tom asked her about Harry’s wand however, she had no knowledge of what happened with it. As Tom thanked her Mipsy round eyes widened immensely and Tom grinned at her as she eventually popped away.  
  
Salazar watched them as Tom moved to an armchair and sat down upon it. He already felt tired again. His body wasn’t used to being awake this long yet… Red eyes closed as he sighed and he could hear mutter something in their mind _. ‘Sleep Tom. We still need to get used to this all.’  
_  
Tom reasoned that Harry was right and surrendered to the sleep. A soft familiar humming tone following him inside his dreams.

* * *

  
Tom knocked on the door and it took some time before Remus Lupin opened it. The werewolf glared down at him and glanced around. “What are you doing here?”  
  
Tom shook his head. “Not out here!” He snarled softly. “I need to speak to Sirius, right now,” Remus seemed reluctant and Tom let out a frustrated growl. “Listen, Harry is gone.” That seemed to do the trick as the werewolf was shocked and clearly concerned.  
  
Remus stepped away and Tom walked in. “What do you mean by that?” Remus asked him and Tom shook his head, as he moved towards the living room.  
  
“Are you alone?” Tom asked him and Remus silently nodded. “Good. It seems like he woke up… he just left the manor. Currently we have no idea where he is at all. So that means that the order is gonna continue to search for Harry Potter, but this time Voldemort will also be going out and search the whole world.”  
  
Remus remained quiet and glanced towards the fireplace. He threw in some floo powder and called out to the DADA office, hoping that Sirius would be there right now. It seems like he was lucky as Sirius was behind his desk, seemingly grading papers.  
  
“Remus?” Sirius asked him as he stood up and made his way to the fireplace.  
  
“You got a visitor.” Remus said carefully, knowing that maybe the floo’s were being watched. Sirius seemed to understand it and nodded.  
  
“Give me one second.” Sirius said quickly as he put some papers away and Remus pulled away from the fireplace, eyeing the young dark-haired wizard warily.  
  
Remus didn’t know if Tom could be trusted, but Sirius seemed to trust him, and Harry also had trusted him, at least that is what Sirius told him. Yet it had not helped anything at all. The fireplace flared green and Sirius stepped out, his eyes immediately looking at Tom. “What happened!?”  
  
“You better sit down…” Tom started as he glanced towards the couches. Sirius and Remus both moved towards them and sat down next to each other, as Tom sat on the other couch with a deep sigh. “Harry woke up.” Tom repeated once more so that Sirius also knew.  
  
Sirius looked hopeful. “He woke up…” Tom hated how hopeful the wizard’s voice sounded in that moment, knowing he would be the one to crush it. He now understood what that felt like.  
  
Harry just leaving him like this felt… Tom didn’t want to acknowledge all those awful feelings he felt inside of him. “He also left…” Tom added quietly.  
  
Sirius seemed frozen, staring at him in shock. “Left..?” The other’s voice was soft and full of disbelief.  
  
Tom gave a small nod. “Voldemort tried to track him…” Tom muttered. “With no success.”  
  
Remus placed a hand on top of Sirius’s shoulder and Tom would give anything to get some form of comfort as well, preferably from Harry himself. But there was simply no way…  
  
“Tom said that right now the order would be searching for Harry and Voldemort will as well.” Remus whispered.  
  
“I will be searching for him too,” Tom added, staring at Sirius. “The deal still stands, don’t say a word about this all.”  
  
Sirius nodded, feeling slightly numb. He still blamed himself for what had happened back then after the Quidditch world cup, even if no one could have known their target would be Harry. “Is he alright…? I mean after this potion, he must have had his memories returned, right?” Sirius questioned him and Tom nodded.  
  
“I assume he has, just like Voldemort wanted.” Tom said softly. In the end Tom had told Sirius about what happened to Harry, knowing how distressed Black was becoming. Tom never told them about him being Voldemort, or being half of Voldemort’s soul. He knew they would not react well to it.  
  
But in the end Sirius trusted him, because he had never hurt Harry and had always been there for him during those times. Tom even ended up telling that he had been trying to locate Harry, while the boy had been in his coma-like state, but risking getting Harry away from Voldemort was a suicide mission.  
  
Sirius had also told Remus about him after Harry’s disappearance at the world cup and both of them had placed Harry’s fate in his hands and he had failed them both now. He had failed Harry. Sirius buried his head in his hands and Tom remained silent as he heard soft sobs coming from the other male. Remus glanced up at him and Tom knew it was better if he left.  
  
Tom got up but stopped when Remus spoke. “Wait...” He said as he stood up. “Isn’t it better to tell Albus about this all?” Cold dread filled Tom at those words and he looked at the werewolf.  
  
“Albus and I… don’t really get along pretty well.” Tom said carefully. He could see Remus trying to put all the pieces together.  
  
“Because you are a Death Eater…” Remus’s voice held a soft accusation. “I don’t understand why you would want to help Harry, but… from everything I have seen and heard.” Remus stopped there, unable to understand Tom’s reasonings. Yet Remus knew the young male cared about Harry as well. Tom told them he met Harry after his second year had ended in Surrey and helped him. Sirius had acknowledged that Tom was telling the truth, but Remus couldn’t help but feel left out at times…  
  
“I don’t want Dumbledore to know about me.” Tom said once more. Sirius looked up.  
  
“He could help us, if he knows everything maybe he could help us.” Sirius said as he got up. “You tried to bring Harry back, and you failed,” Sirius stated harshly. “Now it is our turn… we will speak to Dumbledore and you will come with us, Tom.”  
  
Surely… this must be the stupidest thing he would ever do. He didn’t need Dumbledore’s help…  
  
But as he looked at Sirius, Tom noticed that he was serious. The other wizard was planning on telling Dumbledore one way or another. “The vow will kill you…” He said softly.  
  
Sirius shook his head and approached him. “You think I care about that at this point. I trusted and believed in you. I waited patiently for you to bring Harry back; you told us time and time again it would be alright. Were those all lies!?” Sirius yelled.  
  
“I didn’t want this to happen either! I have no idea what is going on inside Harry’s mind that he got up and left.” Tom snarled back.     
  
Sirius gripped his shoulder and Tom raised his wand at him, dark eyes glaring at him. “Release me this instant.” Tom said in a cold and detached voice.  
  
Sirius was frozen as he felt the strong magic around Tom. He knew what the teenager was capable of and he pulled back a bit. “I will tell Albus…” Sirius stated.  
  
“Then you will die,” Tom said back, seemingly not caring about it. “You will only hurt Harry when he comes back and knows you got yourself killed.” As Tom suspected a look of guilt appeared on Sirius’s face.  
  
But then Sirius looked even more determined. “At least he will be safe… I don’t care if I have to sacrifice myself to protect him.”  
  
Tom stared up in disbelief at the other and lowered his wand. He could see that Sirius was not going to back down from his decision and Tom knew how hurt Harry will truly be when the boy found out that his godfather was dead…  
  
And it truly baffled him how easily someone would be willing to throw his life away for someone else… Was this Sirius’s love for Harry?  
  
“Sirius…” Remus said softly, as if also trying to reason with him on this.  
  
“No, Remus. My decision is made. It all depends on Tom whether I live yes or no.” Sirius said as he glared at the teenager in front of him.  
  
Tom gritted his teeth. He could just turn his back on this all and ignore it, but a sting of guilt made him from leaving this house for now. “Let’s go to Hogwarts then…” Tom muttered darkly after some time.  
  
Harry would never forgive him if he somehow found out about Sirius dying and it being his fault… Tom knew he could just kill them both here and now… but in the end it would be the same… Hell, maybe even he would never forgive himself.  
  
For he knew how much Harry cared about Sirius and Remus and that was the only damn reason he was even here. Tom had a feeling that meeting Albus Dumbledore would not end well… He was acting just as foolish as Sirius now… Tom cast his gaze down, as he considered if he felt more for Harry than just friendship… Could it be that he truly loved his soulmate and had been unaware of it all along?


	4. My heart is more than broken, it is shattered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Albus meets a sixteen year old Tom Riddle, as Remus, Sirius and Tom enter his office. Luna explains to the headmaster what was happening exactly and hands Tom a new stone, while telling him what he did wrong. 
> 
> Harry watches over the horcrux inside him as Tom sleeps. He thinks back on everything and what the future could possibly bring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short update, since I didn’t have much time to write and my inspiration is all over the place… T.T
> 
> Anyway enjoy!! All mistakes are still my own!  
> Many thanks to those who still follow this story/series!

### Chapter 4:

  
'Cos my heart is more than broken, it is shattered,  
And your face is all that I see in my dreams,  
With a pain imagination could never believe,  
Little angel, sleep in peace;  
*Chris De Burgh: "Little Angel"  


* * *

 

**Hogwarts, 16 September 1994:**  
Tom braced himself as Sirius knocked on the headmaster’s door. He could still turn away and run, but wasn’t that the coward’s way out. Besides it would raise more suspicion towards him if he ran now.  
  
“Enter.” Albus called out and the three entered. Tom kept his face blank as he entered the office. He saw Albus’s eyes shift to him and the elder wizard stiffened a bit, but other than that he showed no outward reaction. “Remus, Sirius…” Albus stopped, until he eventually added. “Tom.”  
  
Remus frowned slightly, noticing the tension in between the two wizards and he could see that Tom was either ready to attack or defend himself.  
  
“Albus, we have some news… regarding Harry.” Sirius said immediately, not quite picking up on the tension that was hanging heavily in the room.  
  
Blue bespectacled eyes left Tom as he stared at Sirius. “And what kind of news would that be?” Albus asked him softly, but Albus glanced back towards Tom. “Why are you even here, Tom?”  
  
Tom saw that Albus frowned, clearly not fully understanding the whole situation. As a matter of fact, Tom barely knew why he did this… Oh, right… Harry would be furious at him if Sirius or Remus would die.  
  
“I am here because I am the one who knows what happened to Harry. Voldemort handed him a potion that left him in a comatose state for like two months. He woke up just yesterday and left Slytherin manor…” Tom said, carefully watching Albus’s reaction to his words.  
  
Like he guessed Albus picked up on the subtle hints he had left. “Did he now?” Albus still questioned him, as those blue eyes stared at him over those glasses.  
  
“Yes…” Tom said through clenched teeth, keeping Albus out of his mind, as he felt a slight push against his Occlumency barriers.  
  
The headmaster straightened and Sirius now also warily looked between them. “Albus, Tom means no harm. He even protected Harry.” Sirius explained, hoping to some ease some of the tension. Remus watched their interactions carefully, but he could see that somethings were clearly left unsaid. His suspicion was confirmed as Albus addressed both him and Sirius.  
  
“Sirius, Remus, could you please leave? I wish to speak to Tom alone.” Albus said, looking at the two of them.  
  
Sirius took a step forward, clearly intending to defend Tom, but Remus grabbed his shoulder and shook his head. Sirius shook his head as he stared at Remus and then fixed his gaze upon Tom, who was staring rather coldly towards Albus now.  
  
“He may be a death eater…” Sirius started softly. “But he is not all that bad. It is thanks to him that I got free.” Remus then pulled Sirius out, leaving Tom and Albus alone.  
  
Albus leaned back and gestured towards the chair in front of his desk. Tom remained standing, not taking the silent invitation to sit down. “I must say last time we saw each other you looked awful, Tom. I could hardly see that you were still human.” Those blue eyes watched him intently.  
  
Tom however wisely remained silent and Albus just unnervingly stared at him. He knew however that there was no way he was going to let Albus inside his mind.  Silence stretched on and Tom started to regret coming here after all.  
  
“Though… I do not believe you know what I am speaking off,” Albus said softly and Tom glared at him. A small smile appeared on the headmaster’s face. “You look exactly like you did in your Hogwarts years, as if you haven’t aged a day...”  
  
“I did not come here to speak about me,” Tom sneered at him. “There are far more important things right now. WE need to find Harry before Voldemort finds him.”  
  
“You mean you find Harry?” Albus asked him and Tom’s magic reacted to his outburst of anger and the trinkets floating in the room blasted apart. Albus didn’t react at all; those blue eyes merely watched him, as if trying to solve a puzzle.  
  
“Let me make this clear, right here, right now,” Tom said in an icy voice that betrayed his anger and loathing to the wizard sitting there in front of him. “I am _nothing_ like Voldemort.”  
  
Once again silence filled the room as they regarded each other. “No, you are not,” Albus eventually spoke as he leaned forward. “You’re far saner than he is and you look different than him.”  
  
Tom relaxed, but only then realised the error of his mistake… He could see Albus’s calculating gaze, putting all the pieces together, but that was impossible. Albus Dumbledore didn’t know about his horcruxes…  
  
“You protected Harry?” Albus asked him, bringing Tom out of his thoughts.  
  
His lips thinned and he forced a fake smile on his face. “His uncle would have beating him, maybe even end up killing him. The way he was treated there was wrong and you even tried to take him back there!” With every word spoken the smile slipped from Tom’s face and his voice rose.  
  
“I admit I was wrong. I did not think it was that bad.” Albus said and the headmaster didn’t even flinch as the windows in his office broke at Tom’s magic outburst, letting the warm evening wind in. Fawkes trilled at the strong outburst of magic and then started to sing.  
  
Blue eyes watched warily as Tom gathered himself, but there was still a cold look in those dark eyes.  
  
“I want to speak to Luna Lovegood.” Tom said eventually, knowing if anyone knew more, it was Luna. Besides he was done with Albus, he didn’t want to see the elder wizard ever again if he got the chance.  
  
Albus opened his mouth as a knock sounded on his door. “Enter.” He called out and Tom slightly turned, not wanting anyone at his back that could harm him. He made sure to keep both Dumbledore in his view as well as the slowly opening door.  
  
Tom’s eyes widened however as Luna entered, a small smile playing on her lips. Remus followed after her, shaking his head. “Sorry, she wouldn’t take no for an answer. She said it was important and that she needed to be here.”  
  
“It’s quite alright, Remus.” Albus said with a soft smile as both Remus and Sirius glanced around the now half destroyed office in shock.  
  
Luna merely smiled brightly as she walked towards Tom, who stood there dumfounded for a few seconds, before he let out a soft laugh. “You never cease to amaze me, Luna…” He muttered. Luna’s smile faded a bit and Tom felt his heart drop. He just knew without even asking. She could not give him the information he wanted. “Where is Harry…?”  
  
Albus watched the two with clear interest, putting more pieces together. Tom had also met Luna Lovegood, so that means that Tom had been with Harry at that point… Blue eyes narrowed a slight fraction, could it be the diary that Ginevra Weasley had somehow ended in Harry’s hands still?  
  
“He is never far, Tom,” Luna replied softly. “But I cannot give you an exact location. Just know that he is doing quite alright, considering everything.”  
  
Tom felt some of the stress leave him and then asked the question that had been haunting through his mind. “You know why he left…” Luna gave a small nod, her eyes turning sad. “Why?” Tom’s voice was a mere whisper and he sounded so lost and broken that even Albus frowned at the strange behaviour that was so unlike the Tom he had known.  
  
The blond girl pulled something from her pocket and handed it to Tom, who let out a groan at seeing a small stone in his hand. The necklace that Luna had made him of Quartz, Rose quartz and amethyst was still hanging around his neck. “What do I need this for?” Tom asked, maybe a bit colder than he had intended.  
  
Luna didn’t seem bothered by his harsh tone and replied. “For your trust issues…”  
  
Silence filled the room as Tom looked up, taken aback by her words. Her silver eyes were fixed upon his as she spoke softly again. “Harry left because you lied to him and he felt hurt by it all. You didn’t trust him with some information and the potion unlocked Harry’s memories of Hadrian,” At the mention of that name Albus’s eyebrows rose slightly. “The truth was revealed and I guess the rest is a _mere memory.”_  
  
At those last two words Tom’s eyes widened and he opened his mouth in shock. Albus had never seen Tom’s face looked so utterly shocked and defeated than at this point. Luna carefully closed Tom’s hand around the blueish stone as Tom started to compose himself.  
  
“I warned you…” Luna muttered sadly, knowing that Tom was trying to comprehend it all. “I told you to open up to him; I was hoping that you would tell him the whole truth. When I heard you kept something so devastating from him…” Luna’s voice broke off as she sadly shook her head and Tom turned around, turning his back on all of them, not caring anymore that he would make himself vulnerable...  
  
His heart was hammering against his chest. He felt a pain deep inside of him. A small sob tore from his mouth, as he realised that it was his fault as well… If he had told Harry the truth back then. If he had said to Harry that the diary was a horcrux and had explained it all to him… would Harry still have left without him?  
  
Or would Harry have confided in him and would they have left Slytherin manor together? Tom closed his eyes as he let his head hang down. He had always screamed at his main soul that he was to blame for it all. Yet he had made mistakes just as well. Hadrian of course knew everything about him, being his Guardian Angel and all. It meant that right now Harry also knew about the diary being a horcrux and he couldn’t blame the younger wizard for being angry at him… He had made a mistake…  
  
“I think I want an explanation…” Albus said softly, aware that something was definitely different with this Tom.  
  
The blond girl looked up at the headmaster. “It is a story that will blow your mind away. You would realise that you knew nothing at all.”  
  
Albus nodded. “Tell me.” He said to her.  
  
Luna told them about the other beings, angels living next to them, helping them, guiding them. She then proceeded to tell them about Hadrian, Tom’s guardian angel and how at one point Hadrian had been forced to leave and be reborn.  
  
Hadrian’s soul had reincarnated and Harry was born with his soul. Albus listened intently, finally understanding Tom’s loss of control and the moments when the Dark Lord had been screaming Hadrian’s name.  
  
After Luna finished her explanation Albus stared at her, his blue eyes almost scanning through her, but noticing that she wasn’t lying at all. He took a glance towards Tom, who was still standing with his back to them all, his body tense and Albus frowned.  
  
“This… is certainly unlike anything I have ever heard.” Albus said softly and Sirius laughed, making everyone in the office look towards him, even Tom glanced over his shoulder.  
  
“I know right. I thought the same thing, but I have seen Harry and Tom,” Sirius pointed towards said person. “Together and I know that Harry cares deeply for him.” Remus had not seen them together, but he did take Sirius’s word for it.  
  
Albus knew that Sirius and Remus hadn’t connected the dots just yet about Tom being Voldemort. Though Remus had a thoughtful look on his face, clearly trying to put the missing pieces together. Albus sighed and felt slightly hesitant as he met Tom’s eyes. “What is it you want from Harry?”  
  
Tom should have seen the question coming, yet he still felt angered that even now Albus was daring to question him. “I want to keep him safe. If Voldemort finds him first, he is screwed.”  
  
Albus gave a small nod. “So you want my help to find him then?” Tom narrowed his eyes; it was a blow straight to his pride, to go so low as to ask anyone for help.  
  
“No. Sirius and Remus wanted you to know. I merely accompanied them and gave them permission to tell you, since otherwise they would have died.” Tom snarled at him and Sirius frowned at the way Tom spoke to him.  
  
“I feel like we are missing something…” Sirius muttered as he looked back towards the headmaster.  
  
“I know Tom from some time ago.” Albus merely stated, not giving any further explanation and Tom felt suspicious. It was easy for Albus to rat him out, to tell Harry’s godfather that he was Voldemort… Yet the headmaster kept quiet about the matter.  
  
Sirius crossed his arms over his chest and glanced between the two of them. Remus just silently watched their interactions as well. “You clearly also know that Tom is his follower…” Sirius stated.  
  
“Once ago I know a boy who made all the wrong choices…*” Albus’s voice was soft and his eyes turned sad. “If I had known back then how he would turn out in the end, I would have done more for him,” Albus looked towards Tom. “Maybe sometimes we are giving a second chance to do it right.” He added softly.  
  
Tom had the strange feeling that Albus was talking about him. He cast his gaze down as in his mind he could still see Voldemort. That was his future after the diary had been created, that is what he became. Disgust went through him and he scowled as he once again met Albus’s gaze.  
  
“A second chance…” Tom muttered. “You’re willing to give that to me?” Albus nodded and Tom honestly didn’t know what to say, instead his hand tightened around the small blue stone.  
  
Looking towards the blond girl who had giving it to him, he saw Luna watching him seriously. “What happens now?”  
  
Luna’s lips curved upwards in a dreamy smile. “Now we wait. For as long as Harry does not want to be found, we will not find him.”  
  
Tom didn’t like that at all. HE wanted to see Harry; he needed to know if he was alright after everything, even though Luna had told him that he was doing okay... It felt like meaningless words, if he could not see it with his own eyes.  
  
“Trust him, Tom.” Luna said. Could he do that? In a way he had trusted Harry more than anyone else. Harry had protected the diary and him for some time. He closed his eyes with a deep sigh as he had no idea how to deal with this. He couldn’t just sit down and wait…  
  
But he could do something else… He opened his eyes and he saw Luna staring sideways and he knew that maybe an angel or something was speaking to her.  
  
He saw how Luna’s eyes widened a small fraction as her silver eyes turned back to him. “Tom…” She said softly, a worried tone in her voice.  
  
“Don’t worry. I can take care of myself. Besides someone needs to keep an eye on Voldemort.” Tom said and he could see the shocked expressions of both Remus and Sirius.  
  
“You what!?” Sirius screamed out.  
  
Tom merely grinned. “I am going back to Slytherin manor and make sure that no matter what Voldemort will not find Harry.”  
  
Albus let out a soft laugh and Tom glared at him. Blue eyes were twinkling and Tom couldn’t remember ever seeing them twinkle when they watched him. He was so used to those blue eyes staring down at him, accusing him of everything bad that happened.

“The Order will continue their search for Harry.” Albus merely said with a smile on his face. “I am looking forward to working together with you, Tom.”  
  
Tom’s grip on the stone tightened once more and he forced a smile on his face. “The pleasure is all mine.” Luna giggled, as she watched them both. Sirius and Remus were just dumfounded by everything that was happening.  
  
Tom couldn’t help but think that they made a strange team, at least Remus and Sirius were unaware of who he truly was, but still.  
  
Tom knew he would have to watch his back anyway. He had no idea what Albus was planning right now and he wondered if he would be safer inside Slytherin manor… Considering there was an insane version of his soul in there, Tom doubted it.  
  
At least Albus had not raised his wand at him or attacked him. Tom stared at the headmaster, wondering why Albus was willing to give him a second chance…

* * *

**Dreamscape:**  
Harry hummed softly, while the horcrux inside him slept. He however felt that he couldn’t sleep, not really.  
  
He just couldn’t stop thinking. He made sure to hide these thoughts far behind walls inside his mind. He didn’t want, couldn’t let, Tom know about it after all. If Tom knew, Harry feared what could possibly happen.  
  
Because a few times he did consider leaving this all behind, leaving Tom behind. The thoughts entered his mind and faded again, but they were there nonetheless. In a way Harry simply felt done… He was done with this all…  
  
Green eyes glanced up at the sleeping body in front of him, knowing that it was a good thing that the horcrux inside him was unaware of his thoughts as well. Tom merely slept there, lying on the soft sand of the beach. Looking like this Harry could mistake him for himself.  
  
With those vibrant red eyes closed tightly, it was truly as if he was looking at himself.  
  
He slowly stopped humming, as he stared at the other. After everything that had happened, could he truly do this all? How foolish was it… here he was once again watching over Tom, trying to protect him and make him see reason that what he was doing was wrong.  
  
Trying to tell Voldemort that he should have never split his soul and should absorb them. How often had he, as Hadrian, asked him to absorb them? Harry knew that he lost count of it. Too many times… Tom’s reply had always been the same, ‘ _no_ ’.  
  
Yet this part of Tom’s soul inside him had somehow gained clarity. He had seen everything through Harry’s life, but when the memories of his past lives had threatened to consume him, Tom had also seen it.  
  
Tom had for the first time seen himself from another’s perspective… Tom had seen himself from Hadrian’s eyes. For the first time in his whole life, Tom had felt and understood love.  
  
The purest form of love even, the love from his guardian angel. Harry was certain that some part of Tom felt disgusted how he had looked at Hadrian. The lust and desire that had often enough been visible in those red slitted eyes.  
  
Harry wondered if Tom would ever forgive himself for it all. He wondered if Tom would ever forgive him in the end.  
  
Harry knew that even with the Deathly Hallows in his possession, there was nothing he could do to stop it in the end. He feared it, but at the same time he knew he could hardly turn back now.  
  
Mending Tom’s soul was something that he felt he must do. He had failed before, now he wasn’t planning on failing. He couldn’t turn his back on Tom… No matter what he thought, he had to continue onwards.  
  
Part of Harry however felt scared still, for no doubt that Tom regaining his whole soul all of a sudden could quite possibly destroy the dark wizard… If that were bound to happen… Harry wondered if he would ever forgive himself for it.  
  
He was aware of the tears rolling over his cheeks, as he silently cried. He could feel a deep ache inside of him; it was hurting him far more than he could ever understand. As Hadrian he had not felt any negative emotions, but he was not Hadrian anymore.  
  
He felt like some kind messed up person. Stuck between two personalities that was undoubtedly his… He was glad he had been able to filter away all his other lives… But he simply had been unable to lock away Hadrian’s life.  
  
The knowledge that Hadrian had was far too important. Harry gritted his teeth as he closed his eyes. He could bear this… He could do this.  
  
“I hope one day you will forgive me, Tom.” Harry muttered softly, his voice lost in the sea wind.  
  
The sleeping body in front of him didn’t even stir at all, as Harry forced his eyes open, Tom was still laying in the same position. One of Tom’s hands was stretched out towards him, unconsciously. Even now Tom was reaching out to him.  
  
Green eyes glanced up at clear blue sky above them and a sad smile formed on his lips as he thought back to a particular memory. It was as if he could see it play out above him.  
  
Hadrian flying, his white wings flapping, soaring on the wind above that beautiful ocean. Tom, no. Voldemort, flying next to him. Both of them smiling and Hadrian’s laugh was like music in his ears.  
  
Harry couldn’t blame Voldemort… Hadrian had captured and enthralled Voldemort in more ways than one. Yet Voldemort was simply insane and Hadrian had not seen it. The Dark Lord was possessive and the desires he felt were… unholy.  
  
Harry realised why he felt that ache deep down inside him. It was as if his heart was broken, or maybe even worse. He had seen how Tom turned from a genius boy into a madman and had been so utterly helpless to stop it…  
  
Now he would force Tom’s soul back together, hoping that the madness and insanity of merging all those pieces together would not destroy or kill Tom. Though deep down Harry knew what to expect.  
  
Maybe that is why he felt so reluctant and scared… Mending Tom’s soul could quite possibly destroy his soul completely…


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luna has a vision in the summer holiday. Harry faces a memory of one of his other lives and tries to ignore it the best he can. The horcrux inside Harry finally admits that he was wrong and feels guilty about how he had looked at Hadrian. Albus has told Severus about what had happened and the potions master is reluctant to believe any of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I am still alive… But life has been busy and no inspiration, so yeah all my stories were kind of on a short hiatus I guess. Recently I started to reread Guardian Angel and fixed many mistakes/typos. My inspiration slowly is coming back, but it is still not much. 
> 
> But I am glad to have finished another chapter at least xD. So sorry for the long wait and just wanted to let you all know that I changed and added some stuff(not really important, but a few details and such). Chapter 22 from Guardian Angel is where I started to add some stuff. So I guess if you want to reread it, you can, but I didn’t think it was anything major(this was weeks ago, so I can’t exactly remember). I do know that I changed the second last chapter of Guardian Angel quite a bit(especially regarding the potion that Voldemort had handed to Harry). 
> 
> Anyway enough about that. Hope you all enjoy this chapter and thank you very much for all the comments, kudos and so on that I still received in all those weeks of not updating anything at all!

### Chapter 5:

**Dreamscape - 25 August 1994:  
** Something was glistering in the distance. Compelled to go to it, Luna carefully moved towards the strange flickering light. Aware that she was dreaming and that this might be some kind of vision she made sure to pay attention to everything around her.  
  
As she neared the light she heard something. Still not knowing what it exactly was, she moved even closer and that is when she heard what it was. It was the sound of someone crying loudly. It was definitely a male and the loud sobbing continued. In fact it only got worse.  
  
Luna stopped as her heart ached for the pain that the other person was in. Her silver eyes focused on the light, seeing it flickering and just a mere second later burst out into flames. The crying stopping abruptly with it. Shocked she stepped back, wide eyes watching the fire in front of her. It felt like it was threatening to consume everything.  
  
Yet Luna found herself unable to tear her eyes away from the raging flames, seeing how they danced in the wind. How the wind rushed through and past it only increasing the fire and the agony within that she could feel.  
  
A slight frown appeared on her face at the sight she was seeing and finally she understood the feeling she felt down deep inside her. Sorrow, despair, regret, all of it mixed together with the heavy feeling of loss. It was a sadness so great that it brought tears to her eyes.  
  
And as slowly the tears rolled over her cheeks, she still stared at the red dancing flames. The person that she heard crying before… this sadness must be coming from him.  
  
“Ariel…” She whispered, opening her connection with her guardian angel. Luna felt her soothing presence appear behind her, but still she didn’t look away from the great fire in front of her. “What is the meaning of this?” The blonde girl asked softly.  
  
Ariel stepped forward and stood next to her, also eyeing the fire in front of them. “You can feel it, can’t you Luna?” Luna merely nodded as she didn’t have any control over the tears that rolled over her cheeks. “You already know what this is.”  
  
Luna knew, but she didn’t want to acknowledge it. Yet as her guardian angel said this, she knew that in the end she had to face the reality. Closing her eyes she let out a shuddering sob.  
  
“This is how it feels to lose a loved one. The utter grief and despair mixed with remorse. It was his fault that his loved one died.” Ariel whispered and Luna shook her head as if she could deny it.  
  
A broken scream sounded from in between the flames as if the male had heard those words and Luna’s eyes shot open. Vision slightly blurry from the tears, but still she saw how the flames increased. The anguished screaming didn’t stop and Luna took another step backwards.  
  
“Who?” Luna found herself asking and her small soft voice fitted her age all of a sudden. Despite all the knowledge that she had, she was still only a child.  
  
“Tom Riddle.” Ariel replied and Luna saw how the flames spread. The fire consumed everything as the male screamed and Luna let out a terrified scream of her own as the flames raged towards her, encasing her whole dream scape in the destructive fire.  
  
With a scream, Luna sat up. She could feel her heart thumping loudly inside her chest and her eyes were wide as she felt the vision she had seen slowly slip away from her. Closing her eyes, she focused upon the feelings she remembered and the views what she had seen. A vision… It was clearly a vision that the angels had send her…  
  
“Ariel…” Luna called out softly to her angel and relaxed when she felt her presence manifest next to her. Forcing her eyes open and blinking away the tears she glanced up.  
  
Ariel smiled sadly at her while Luna tried to relax and understand what she had seen… Finally her eyes closed and in a soft voice asked a question which she dreaded to hear the answer of. “Will Tom or Harry die?”  
  
Because Luna knew that if Tom died then it would truly destroy Harry… But if Harry died… How would Tom react? Despite everything Luna didn’t know enough about Tom to know what his reaction would be, especially not because his soul was all over the place. The bond between them was strong and highly unusual however and remembering what she had seen, Luna had a feeling that Harry’s death would completely destroy Tom.  
  
“They might. The future is not fixed just yet. Things are changing rapidly,” Ariel replied. “What you saw is merely one of the possible outcomes.”  
  
Luna’s eyes shot open as she felt another presence appear.  “Gabriel?”  
  
The archangel smiled sadly at her. “Times are changing rapidly indeed, dear child. Tom, the diary horcrux, will return to Hogwarts one day. He will be desperate, as will his main soul. They will be searching for Harry everywhere.”  
  
Luna wasn’t surprised by this and she saw that Ariel wasn’t either. Of course her guardian angel knew much more, but couldn’t tell her everything she knew either.  
  
In time Ariel and the archangels might let her know, but as long as fate was running its course. Nothing could stop it, not even the angels.  
  
Luna sighed deeply and gathered herself, knowing that she could think and probably cry about this all later. “Do I need to help Tom?” She asked.      
  
Gabriel gave a small nod. “Don’t let him fall. Be there for him since Harry isn’t.”  
  
Her heartbeat skipped at those words. “I can’t replace Harry…” She whispered sadly. She knew that no one could replace Harry.  
  
“No, you cannot. But Tom needs someone right now. The others will not fully accept him. They never will, especially when they find out the truth. Still Dumbledore will give him a second chance,” Gabriel sighed softly as she continued.  “Even now Harry will do everything to protect him and he isn’t alone Luna. He has a piece of Tom’s soul inside of him as well.”  
  
Silver eyes went wide as she stared at Gabriel, almost wishing that the angel would take back those words. But even Ariel’s sad expression was proof enough that Gabriel wasn’t lying. “Harry is a horcrux?” Her voice full of disbelief and shock at this revelation and Gabriel nodded. “They don’t know…” Luna muttered sadly after a tense silence, putting the pieces together.  
  
Gabriel shook her head. “The way things are going now, they will find out one day. But by then it will be too late.”  
  
Luna had felt how her whole body had tensed at her words. “What will Harry do?” It was a stupid question, Luna knew this. Michael had so often told her that Hadrian had tried to persuade Tom to reabsorb the horcruxes. Now that Harry had most likely his memory restored, his mission might be the same.  
  
This time however he was a human capable of interacting with everything around him. But then… The horcrux inside Harry…  
  
“Harry will die…” Luna muttered in a soft voice as if not wanting to accept her own words as true. Gabriel didn’t say anything and Luna let herself fall back down on the bed. Her silence was answer enough…  
  
“The horcrux inside of Harry believes that it could be dangerous to extract the horcrux out of a living person and he will attempt to stop this. He will search for the Deathly Hallows.” Gabriel said softly. Luna closed her eyes. The Master of Death…  
  
“You told me once that Tom had to feel remorse to absorb the horcruxes again,” Luna said and looked back at Gabriel. “You also said it would destroy his soul if he didn’t feel remorse…”  
  
“Tom’s soul is… unstable at best. Even when it will be mended it will have cracks. He will be probably unable to cope with a whole soul, since he lived so many years with a mere sliver. The chances that it would destroy his soul remain, no matter what.” Gabriel said softly.  
  
“Why? Why then would Harry do this?” Luna asked.  
  
Gabriel’s eyes turned sad at her question. “Because he loves Tom so much that he would be willing to sacrifice it all, even himself. Hadrian wished nothing more than seeing Tom’s soul complete again, because that is the way it is supposed to be and Harry has inherited those feelings.”  
  
And it felt as if those words doomed Harry completely. Luna knew that if Harry was intent on going through with this that she could do nothing to stop him. But despite this she couldn’t help but worry. Harry was her first real friend and… this was just cruel.  
  
Luna sat back and cradled her head in her hands, ignoring the two angels completely. She did feel Ariel reach out to her, but she blocked them out. Crying softly she shut the connection down and was unable to feel them.  
  
Pulling her knees to her chest she cried and cried. The last time she had cried so much was when her mother had died. Despite knowing that death wasn’t the end, she would never be able to hug her again, to feel her warm body encase her and soothe her. Her body was buried deep down inside the earth and her soul had moved on.  
  
As her sobs slowly died down, Luna was at least determined to try and change the future. She hoped that Harry would become the Master of Death and live. That Tom would feel true remorse and that his soul wouldn’t break while being mended.  
  
She wished desperately that the two of them got their happy ending, because most of all Harry deserved it. And Luna knew that Harry only wanted his happy ending with one person… Tom.  
  
The days after that conversation with Ariel and Gabriel and before Luna returned to Hogwarts, she had become withdrawn and even her father had seemed worried about her. Asking if everything was alright and if he could do something to help her.  
  
Luna had said that he could do nothing to help her. She wondered if even she could do anything to fix this all. She shouldn’t mess with fate, she knew that. Still when the day would come when Tom approached her again, she would try her best to make him see that what he did was wrong.  
  
Tom, the diary, carried half of his soul. It would be important to have at least Tom feel true remorse. Yet… Luna wondered if it would be enough. If Voldemort, the main soul, didn’t feel any regret at all. It would maybe not be enough…  
  
Maybe in the end, she couldn’t win against fate, but she was willing to give it a try.

**Slytherin Manor – 17 September 1994:  
** Tom walked into the manor, not feeling the main soul’s presence anywhere. He frowned as he wondered where Voldemort could possibly be. Making his way towards the ritual room, he noticed it was already completely repaired.  
  
The house-elves must have fixed it, Tom thought as he just decided to wait until Voldemort would return. When evening settled in and there was still no sign of the Dark Lord, Tom knew that something was wrong.  
  
Casting a simply locating spell, he frowned. The Dark Lord was just outside of the manor and Tom sighed as he apparated there, not wanting to waste any time walking.  
  
The sight that greeted him rooted him to the ground. Voldemort was lying on the ground in the middle of a ritual circle. Magic still flowed into the alight runes and Tom had a feeling that something wasn’t quite right.  
  
He didn’t recognize the spell and carefully he moved closer, inching down near the edge of the circle. Voldemort’s magic swirled around inside of it and Tom didn’t dare to enter it as long as the ritual was still somehow in process.  
  
Tom sighed as he just sat down, his eyes fixed upon Voldemort’s unconscious body.  
  
Whatever spell he had used it was clear that something had gone wrong.  
  
For now he could only wait, knowing that interfering with the spell could be disastrous and honestly he couldn’t be bothered to search for whatever ritual/spell Voldemort had used. A small frown etched itself on his face however. How far was Voldemort willing to go to find Harry?  
  
That was the question right now, wasn’t it…? The Dark Lord didn’t harbour love for Hadrian or Harry, but a strong obsession was there nonetheless. It made Tom worry. It made him want to know what had exactly happened between the two of them. It made him wonder once more if his feelings for Harry were different than Voldemort’s. Was he merely obsessed as well or did he truly care, or even love, the young wizard?  
  
Tom’s hand moved up and absent-mindedly he played with the three stones hanging around his neck. The fourth stone was on another rope also on his neck. Trust…  
  
He had placed far more trust in Harry than he had in anyone else. Lowering his hand Tom knew that no matter what, he had to make it right somehow. In truth he hadn’t wanted to lie to Harry, but he just couldn’t find it himself to tell the young wizard about the diary and what it really was either.  
  
Part of him had been afraid his soulmate might reject him in knowing that his soul wasn’t even whole. He had feared that Harry wouldn’t understand his fear and the lasting damage that the muggle war left inside of him.  
  
Tom sighed and closed his eyes. Thinking back on it now, Harry would have accepted it… It might have shocked the younger wizard, but in the end Harry would have understood it. Harry was always so forgiving. Always caring far more for others and forgetting himself in the process.  
  
Dark eyes opened and watched the view in front of him. Harry had even willingly gulped down a potion that Voldemort had created and it was that which proved how deeply Harry cared even for this mangled part of his soul.  
  
It was strange that somehow Harry felt this strong towards them. Strange that Hadrian’s feelings were so strong and it was exactly that which had led Harry to his downfall…  
  
Grabbing the wand from beneath his robe Tom rolled Harry’s wand through his fingers. A familiar feeling, it was almost as if holding that wand was making him feel closer to Harry. The moment that Harry had landed in a coma he had taken Harry’s wand for his own, because it felt much better than the wand that Harry had gifted him for Christmas.  
  
His thoughts turned far darker as he still stared at his main soul. It would be so easy to kill him, right here, right now. Harry would be safe then, he would come back to him if Voldemort was gone, wouldn’t he?  
  
Tom shook his head.  No, Harry was also angry at him for lying… So he reasoned that right now Harry also didn’t want to see him. It hurt and Tom never thought he could feel something like this.  
  
He never thought he would feel regret for anything he had done. But he did.  
  
He regretted that he wanted to kill Harry Potter when he first learned that name. When he learned how the great Dark Lord Voldemort had been defeated by this child named Harry Potter.  
  
He regretted not telling Harry the complete truth back then. It was selfish of him, because in the end it all came down to the same thing. In the end Tom just wanted to have Harry back at his side.  
  
Tom’s grip on the wand tightened as his eyes narrowed at the figure still lying in the middle of the ritual circle.  It would be so _easy_ … One spell. Two simple words and Voldemort would be gone.  
  
Tom relaxed, only then feeling how tense his body had been, and let out a deep sigh. It would be useless… As long as the other horcruxes were still there, Voldemort would find a new way to be reborn. It would buy them some time though.  
  
Raising the wand, he pointed it straight at the Dark Lord. Dark eyes watched as the magic swirled around him. Gritting his teeth Tom debated on the choices he had.  
  
Voldemort was vulnerable right now… Maybe this moment here was the only chance he would get at killing him. But at the same time it felt cowardly… Yet it would also be a mercy. Voldemort would never see it coming. He would just never wake up again, as if he had fallen asleep.  
  
Tom’s grip tightened on the wand. Part of him didn’t feel right in killing his main soul. It was maybe the part that sounded like Harry, saying that killing was wrong no matter what. Or the part inside of him that was scared of death, just like Voldemort was.  
  
Because surely his fear would have never gone away, would it? Tom didn’t know whether Voldemort still feared it as much as he did. Because for Voldemort the muggle war was long ago, but for him it was not. It felt like he was still living in it at times.  
  
Besides Voldemort had many safekeeps now. All the horcruxes and it made Tom wonder if he killed off the Dark Lord. Would Voldemort be able to somehow possess him? If that was the case… then it would not be wise to kill him at all…  
  
Tom scowled and lowered the wand. The urge to just cast the killing curse was there still and maybe later on he would regret not doing it.  
  
Well… Tom had still time to think. As long as Voldemort remained unconscious he could still easily kill the Dark Lord.  
  
**Dreamscape – 17 September 1994:  
** He was running, endlessly running. Away from someone, something. He didn’t know, but he did know that he needed to get away.  
  
He had no time to catch his breath. No time to rest. If that black shadow caught up to him it was over. His tiny hand graced the wall as he swiftly turned a corner. He was panting and his lungs hurt, but he couldn’t stop running. The adrenaline and the need to live was giving him that rush that he needed to keep on going now.  
  
A cold laugh echoed behind him and it made him shiver as he tried to increase his speed. It sounded far closer, to close. Closing his eyes he tried to speed up more. He tried to get away, but the shadow was closing in on him and he was so tired… He couldn’t breathe anymore. His mouth parted and heavy gasps came out, most likely letting the killer know exactly where he was.  
  
“Run, run little one.” The voice behind him said in a cruel voice filled with amusement.  
  
He shook his head, trying to get away. But there was nowhere he could run. The night was dark and no one would miss him… He was going to die here. In one of those damp alleyways. A child forgotten and never remembered.  
  
He was out of breath completely and still tried to stay ahead of the shadow. A hand roughly grabbed his elbow and he screamed. His screams went unheard as he struggled against the larger male. Pure terror coursed through him.  
  
A stab… a blade twisting inside his stomach and he screamed louder, filled with pain and fear. The man however laughed and pulled the knife out, only to thrust it back in next to the first stab wound. It was quickly followed by other stab wounds and his screams slowly died down as the male stabbed him to death. A mangled body of a child forgotten.  
  
Green eyes shot open, wide and unseen for just one second. Harry was panting heavily as the memories slowly ebbed away again.  
   
He wasn’t that small child anymore that had been killed by the serial killer. That life was many years ago. Closing his eyes Harry willed his body to calm down, especially his heart that was beating too fast and loud.  
  
“Good morning,” A voice said and Harry opened his eyes again, focusing upon the portrait of Salazar, who was watching him with intrigue. “Bad dream?”  
  
Harry opened his mouth, but then closed it again as he sat up. “Kind of…” He replied softly. Salazar seemed worried, but Harry forced a smile on his face. “It is nothing.”  
  
It was in the past. “I should go check on Tom. I feel that he is still asleep.” Harry quickly said. It seemed like Salazar wanted to say something, but instead the founder only gave a small nod and Harry focused his attention inward.

* * *

Tom woke up and he blinked his eyes, hearing the familiar waves however he relaxed. “You finally awake again?” A voice asked him and he glanced sideways, seeing Harry sitting next to him.  
  
The scene felt so familiar that for one moment Tom could lose himself in it. He sat up slowly, his eyes never leaving Harry’s. Until finally he broke the eye contact and fixed his gaze upon the sea in front of them. He heard Harry sigh softly and something inside him broke at the sound.  
  
“I already forgave you, Tom,” Harry whispered softly. Tom let out a small snort, not believing the other. “Whether you believe me or not, it is the truth. There is no use in remembering the past.”  
  
“I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I am actually surprised that you are still willing to help me with this.” Tom muttered softly.  
  
He felt Harry move closer, until Harry sat next to him and placed his hand atop of his. Tom fought the urge to glance down and kept looking at the ocean. Still Harry was touching him…  
  
How long had he craved for this? How often had he wished for the moment that he could touch Hadrian? To kiss him, to reach out and feel those soft white wings? To take it even further than that, to actually fuck him, to devour Hadrian completely. A shudder of disgust coiled through him and Tom closed his eyes. He never hated himself more than at this particular moment.  
  
Harry didn’t say anything and Tom wondered if he was aware of the dark thoughts running through his mind. “I don’t deserve your forgiveness…” He repeated much softer this time.  
  
“Yes, you do, Tom. Because you feel guilty about what you did and what you felt. But it is simply a human’s nature to hang on to something. You choose to hang onto Hadrian and in a way it grounded you, while it also destroyed you.” Harry muttered.  
  
Both remained quiet, the only silence were those waves crashing against the shore. Peaceful and calm and so serene. Red eyes closed slowly as Tom relaxed, knowing he was safe here. Knowing that this was always his safe place, no matter what. His and Hadrian’s… or Harry’s now.  
  
Tom felt how Harry intertwined their fingers and he gripped them tighter, unwilling to let him go. Now that he truly had him, now that he could touch him… Yet Tom knew that this was only possible because he had messed up big time.  
  
He had actually raised his wand, not truly believing that Harry could be Hadrian and cast the killing curse. In a way he truly and utterly destroyed himself.  
  
“I love you, Tom.” Harry whispered and Tom bit his bottom lip, as only now he realised how much power those words held. Only now he knew how much Hadrian had truly loved him. To see how that love of Hadrian had survived and was etched into his soulmate’s soul so deeply that Harry felt it…  
  
Tom shifted and pulled Harry against him, as he also felt Harry embrace him. “That guilt, that remorse that you feel will be needed to restore your soul, Tom… please don’t forget this.” Harry whispered, but Tom could hear his voice breaking at the last sentence and something inside him filled with dread.  
  
He pulled back to look at Harry, but the other male had his eyes tightly closed. “We must go…” Harry said softly. “I think you recovered well enough to gather some of the horcruxes.”  
  
“Harry…?” Tom whispered as he moved his hand up and placed it against Harry’s cheek. Those beautiful emerald eyes that had him captured from their very first meeting opened and there was a sadness hidden deep down inside of them.  
  
Harry forced a smile on his face, yet his eyes started to water and Tom shook his head, not understanding why Harry was like this. “Everything will be alright, won’t it Tom?” Harry asked him.  
  
“Of course…” Tom replied, frowning slightly. “Of course it will. We will restore my soul and we will both be alright. We will have the Deathly Hallows, Harry. You don’t need to worry.” Tom didn’t know if he was reassuring himself or Harry at this point, or who needed it the most. There were too many things unknown in the plans…  
  
Harry nodded. “Yes, of course. We will be alright.” Harry said and Tom felt something inside him break at Harry’s sad expression. It was clear that Harry didn’t believe his own words.  
  
“Harry… are you keeping something from me?” Tom asked, almost afraid of the answer and Harry looked him straight in his eyes.  
  
“No…” Harry replied and Tom couldn’t detect any lie. “No, I am just worrying… you are right however, it will be alright.”  
  
Tom looked at him, his frown deepening, but he couldn’t see any sign that Harry was lying. “Are you sure?” He still asked feeling like something was wrong anyway.  
  
Harry laughed, but it sounded more broken than anything else. “Yes, just get out.”  
  
Tom opened his mouth, but suddenly he was blasted out of the dreamscape and he woke up.  
  
“Good morning.” Salazar’s voice greeted him as Tom gasped. Closing his eyes he willed his body to calm down from the sudden wake up call.  
  
_‘Harry?_ ’ Tom asked shocked at what the other had just done.  
  
_‘I’m fine, but we can’t waste any time, Tom.’_ Harry replied and Tom sighed as he decided to drop the subject for now. It was obvious that Harry wasn’t willing to talk about it.  
  
“Well, you clearly aren’t a morning person.” Salazar commented with a soft laugh and Tom let out a groan.  
  
“Good morning to you too.” Tom muttered as he got up from his uncomfortable position in the armchair. He should have transfigured a bed… With a sigh he called out for Mipsy.  
  
The house-elf brought him some breakfast and the newspaper, which he read and he could feel Harry was reading it as well. There was nothing of importance in it and Tom quickly pushed it aside, finishing his breakfast.  
  
Salazar remained quiet and Harry as well, though Tom noticed that Salazar was looking at him strangely. He simply ignored it and was grateful for the silence because he still had a lot to think about. Even if Harry said that he forgave him, Tom couldn’t help but feel like he truly didn’t deserve it.  
  
**Hogwarts – Albus’s office – 18 September 1994:**  
Albus tapped his fingers against the parchment on his desk, while Fawkes next to him was silently cleaning his feathers. Severus remained quiet, having received so much information that his mind was spinning.  
  
“Tell me that this is just a bad dream…” Severus muttered eventually. Albus shook his head as he finally met the other’s eyes.  
  
“I’m afraid not, Severus,” Albus frowned and then continued on. “You know just as well how unstable Tom became after losing this so-called Hadrian.”  
  
Severus preferred to forget those days. If they had called the Dark Lord insane before that, well after that he had completely lost his mind.  
  
“Harry is somehow this Hadrian’s reincarnation and is therefore capable of reaching the Dark Lord in ways that should be unable?” Severus drawled, clearly not impressed with the story that Albus had just told him.  
  
Albus merely smiled with a small shake of his head. “A power the Dark Lord knows not… yes, I think this might be what the prophecy spoke about, Severus. We always misunderstood it because we didn’t know.”  
  
The potions master sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, briefly wondering if Albus had finally lost his mind completely. “And currently everyone is searching for Potter, even the Dark Lord. If even _He_ cannot find him, Albus, it is futile.”  
  
Albus nodded, his face turning serious once more. “Yes, you might be right about that, Severus, but we need to be prepared for anything right now.”  
  
“I find it rather… difficult to believe all this, Albus,” Severus said softly. “Do you truly take Miss Lovegood’s word for it?”  
  
“No, I have seen a side from Tom that I have never seen before,” Albus stated softly and Severus’s eyes widened a small fraction in shock, wondering when the Dark Lord had been in contact with Albus. “I saw him, but there was something different in him. He was… lost and no it is not Voldemort,” Severus suppressed a wince at the name, but Albus continued on. “who was here, so no need to worry, Severus.”  
  
“You just said,” Severus started, but Albus held up his hand and Severus shut his mouth with a silent glare.  
  
“Voldemort was not here, Severus. Part of him was, yes, but not the part that you served.” Albus explained and it only raised more questions for Severus, but Albus clearly wasn’t planning to elaborate and Severus left the headmaster’s office after saying goodbye, knowing that this conversation was over for the time being.  
  
His mind was all over the place, as he considered everything Albus had just told him. Hadrian… it was certainly a name that he hadn’t heard in a long time and Harry Potter was somehow born with Hadrian’s soul…  
  
Albus was surely going insane. Absentmindedly Severus rubbed his hand over his left forearm as he walked down to the dungeons. The mark on his arm a heavy burden he didn’t wish to carry anymore. Yet… the Dark Lord had not summoned him at all. He would loathe the idea of being summoned, but the past months he had actually wished for it to happen.  
  
Harry Potter was, or had been, in Voldemort’s hands. There had been no doubt about it. There was no one that had any information about it and the sudden death of Lucius had raised many questions for him. He didn’t dare approach Narcissa however and Draco was far too young to get mixed up in this. Meaning there was no news about Harry Potter at all.  
  
Until now it seemed. Harry had somehow managed to get away if Albus was correct. Severus withheld a sigh, not knowing what he could actually believe.  
  
As Severus reached his office he stopped as he saw a blond girl standing there. She was humming softly and he closed his eyes and straightened as he approached her, considering she was standing in front of his office door there was no way around it.  
  
“Miss Lovegood, can I help you?” Severus sneered at her and the girl simply smiled up at him, not at all bothered by his nasty attitude. She truly was an odd girl…  
  
“Yes, sir. Actually I want to ask for your assistance this evening. I want to go inside the Forbidden Forest,” Severus raised his eyebrow and her smile brightened. “I heard that the fireflies are rather active in there right now, I want to capture some of them.”  
  
Severus crossed his arms over his chest, as he looked down on her. “Out of the question, Miss Lovegood.”  
  
Severus moved forward, intending to go into his office as Miss Lovegood stepped aside. Her voice halted him however. “I know where Harry is. If you come with me this evening, we might find him.”  
  
As Severus turned around but Lovegood was already skipping away and he could only watch her back with wide eyes as she disappeared around the corner. He stood there frozen for a few seconds, before deciding he had more than enough on his mind for now.  
  
One thing was for certain however; Albus had finally gone insane. The girl was living in another world entirely. One that Severus didn’t want to live in at all…


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry and Tom meets Luna when they go out in the Forbidden Forest and surprisingly Snape has accompanied her. Tom thinks back on a memory with Hadrian in it that drastically changed him and he loses his mind. Harry attempts to help, but ends up making matters worse and a rift appears between them.  
> Voldemort is angry at his failings and decides to take another approach to find Hadrian.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter messed me up big time… Honestly I had it written weeks(months) ago really, but it just never felt quite right. Now I finally ended up changing some stuff to make it better and I feel a bit more satisfied about this chapter :). So here is an update ^-^!  
> Hope you all enjoy and many thanks for the kudos, comments and so on ^-^!  
> And also Happy Easter if any of you celebrates it :)! Ps. Sorry that this is a rather sad chapter… nothing I can change about it.

### Chapter 6:

 **18 September 1994:  
** Tom and Harry decided to wait out one day at least before leaving the Chamber. Hopefully by then Voldemort had stopped looking again, though both of them knew that this was just wishful thinking.  
  
The Dark Lord wouldn’t stop searching for them until he found Hadrian again and this created some tension between the two of them. Tom was feeling too much guilt on what he had done and had felt in the past, especially as he was seeing how his main soul was still obsessed like this.  
  
Harry had his own worries in mind that he kept quiet about. Even though Tom had asked it a few more times, the young wizard never told him.  
  
The past that was between them was slowly driving them apart and both were aware of it. Yet Tom desperately tried to fix this by making Harry talk about what it was that was worrying him.  
  
After some time Tom just stopped, realising that Harry was growing agitated with his questions.  
  
The silence between them was tense and Salazar had remained quiet as well, simply observing the many emotions flickering on the young wizard’s face.  
  
When evening finally came, Tom sighed and carded a hand through the messy hair of Harry’s head. “What now?” He questioned, hoping that Harry would at least answer this question.  
  
Harry remained silent for some time and Tom knew the other was clearly thinking about what they could possible do. Currently the diadem horcrux was within their reach, but it remained risky to walk through the hallways all the way up to the seventh floor. Even with the use of the secret passageways.  
  
_“I don’t know.”_ Harry replied, echoing his thoughts exactly.  
  
“Let’s just get out of here at least,” Tom muttered as he got up and walked towards the exit which would go to the forbidden forest. “I don’t fancy staying down here a whole day.” Salazar had simply said goodbye and told them to take care as they left the room and Tom only replied with a small hum.  
  
Harry sighed inside their mind as Tom made his way out of the way Chamber and walked into the Forbidden Forest. The air around them smelled like wet forest and the ground was damp. It made Tom feel more relaxed as he just walked through the trees towards the lake.  
  
Stopping near it, he watched how the fairies were dancing above the water. The small lights moving in complete synch with each other and the sight was simply mesmerising. Tom and Harry were both so caught up in watching it that they didn’t hear the other person before she made herself known.  
  
“Pretty, isn’t it?”  
  
Tom whipped around and raised his hand towards the blond girl, ready to attack or defend himself if necessary. Luna Lovegood merely smiled, not at all bothered by it. Tom felt Harry’s confusion briefly, before he felt himself being pushed away and Harry took control of the body. It didn’t feel practically pleasant and Tom let out an irritated groan as he was locked away inside their mind.  
  
Harry ignored Tom’s feelings for the time being as his green eyes fixed upon Luna. “Luna…” He whispered almost in disbelief. It felt so long ago that he had seen her and it had indeed been months, but still it felt much longer.  
  
So much had happened… so much had been revealed, changing everything and Harry was now certain that Luna had known most of it. The smile faded slowly from the girl’s face and Harry shook his head. He didn’t want to see her sad like this…  
  
Walking up to her; he quickly wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a tight hug. Her arms went around him as well and he placed his hand atop of her shoulder, gaining some comfort from the knowledge that she was there and clearly still trying to help him. Because her being here was a sign surely.  
  
“Oh, Harry,” She muttered softly. “I am so sorry.” Her grip tightened briefly before she pulled back and those silver eyes looked into his.   
  
Harry just shook his head, not knowing exactly what she was apologizing for and he also felt Tom’s confusion. “Don’t,” Harry whispered softly. “Please don’t feel sorry. I am already so happy to see you here.”  
  
Her lips curved upwards at those words, though the smile didn’t reach her all-knowing eyes. Harry gritted his teeth and blocked all the memories from Tom, making sure that the other wouldn’t find out just how badly this could end if only one thing went wrong.  
  
Harry opened his mouth, but was interrupted by a shout of his name. “Potter!” His wide eyes went towards the source of the harsh voice that he had immediately recognized. Severus Snape stood there, his wand illuminated as he watched the two of them.  
  
“Professor Snape.” Harry said with a small frown, wondering if Luna had been followed when she had left the castle.  
  
“Hello professor. I told you that the fairies were beautiful tonight, did I not?” Luna instead said with a dreamy voice that belied her earlier sadness.  
  
Harry looked at her with wide eyes, before he couldn’t stop himself anymore. A laugh bubbled up inside of him and when Luna turned to face him once more, he couldn’t contain it any longer. He laughed and felt himself unable to stop.  
  
Luna had actually guided Snape here of all people…  
Harry was vaguely aware that Snape was not amused by this and was glowering at them both as the potions master strode towards them, but despite how hard he tried he couldn’t stop laughing still. He embraced Luna again, seeing her smile as he said loudly to her. “You, Luna, are an angel in disguise.”   
  
In the back of his mind, Harry heard Tom snort at his words and his grin only widened even more.  
  
And as Tom silently watched Harry, Luna and Severus and their interactions he realised that he felt envious…  
  
Harry had never laughed with him like this. Since the moment they woke up and the young wizard let him in, Harry had not laughed for real one single time. Granted it wasn’t that long ago, but still it made something inside him feel tight…  
  
Though the younger wizard had enjoyed the companion of his diary horcrux a lot and had fond memories with him, and even if it was a part of him it felt like it was not. The diary horcrux was created when he had been 16, so many years ago and so much had happened during the time. In the end the horcrux he placed in the diary was simply far purer than he was now. Half a soul and innocent in certain ways that he was not.  
  
Tom couldn’t blame Harry for liking his younger self. He knew how easy people flocked to him, albeit for different reasons. Harry’s reasons for keeping the diary and protecting it had been unknown in the beginning. It was guided by a force that Tom realised was far more powerful than he ever accepted. Love…  
  
That same love that Hadrian felt for him and when Tom found out about this, it had horrified him. He had seen Harry’s whole life and watched carefully how everything had played out with the horcrux and Harry.  
  
Tom watched as Harry grew fonder of the diary horcrux, unaware of the darkness that was hidden underneath. He wasn’t a fool and knew that his other self had probably done stuff behind Harry’s back. The Dursleys for example were most likely tortured, but Harry had been blissfully unaware of it.  
  
He knew himself and it was what he would have done after getting hit like that. Especially after facing a muggle with the clear intent to hurt a magical person, simply for being ‘ _different_ ’. For being a freak or a demon in their eyes.  
  
Sometimes it was simply better not knowing and Tom knew that his diary horcrux had kept secrets from the young wizard. He was certain about that.  
  
A small laugh broke through his thoughts and he focused upon the sound of Harry’s laughter again. It felt like in this moment the young wizard had not a worry in the world. Harry had not laughed a single time since he drank the potion and all those memories threatened to overwhelm him... But now sitting here inside the Chamber with Luna next to him and Severus sitting across of them, Harry was laughing again…  
  
The sound – just like Hadrian’s laughter – was still like music in his ears. He always wanted to hear Harry laugh and to never see him sad or lost like he had been a few minutes before.    
  
Tom thought back to those simply days in which he had been the only one who could hear Hadrian’s laughter. He was the only one who saw Hadrian’s smile. For his ears and eyes only… _His beautiful guardian angel…_  
  
It was all different now and Tom silently retreated further back inside Harry’s mind, trying to ignore the ache he felt deep down inside of him.  
  
Memories of long ago filtered through his mind and Tom let them consume him.  
  
**Flashback:  
** “Come on, Tom,” Hadrian pleaded as he pouted and looked at him pleadingly.  
  
Voldemort shook his head with a sneer, simply watching how Hadrian was floating there above the water. He had no intention of doing what Hadrian wanted. It was foolish and there was no use to it at all.  
  
Hadrian let out a sigh and flew towards him, circling around him. Voldemort followed all his movements with his eyes, seeing those beautiful white feathered wings move so easily. “You’re no fun!” Hadrian complained with a groan.  
  
Voldemort opened his mouth, ready to retort and Hadrian laughed. “Don’t answer to that, Tom. Because surely you are going to say that you can’t have fun because of the war and everything going on,” Hadrian landed in front of him with a small sigh. “Maybe just because of that, you need to have some fun.”  
  
Voldemort looked at Hadrian and closed his eyes with a sigh. “Flying is not something that I see as being fun.” He muttered, not understanding why his angel would want this.  
  
Hadrian let out another groan. “Just loosing up a bit, Tom. Remember that first time you actually flew without the aid of a broom or anything else.”  
  
Red eyes opened as he thought back to that particular memory and as if knowing what he was feeling and what went through his mind Hadrian smiled at him. “You were having so much fun back then. Simply because you finally succeeded.”  
  
Voldemort had no argument against that and he sighed again. “Why do you want to fly together?” He questioned instead.  
  
Hadrian frowned briefly before replying. “I already told you. It will be fun.”  
  
“Fun…” Voldemort repeated the word slowly and Hadrian’s eyes turned sad for one brief second, before his angel smiled brightly and flew backwards, never breaking eye contact.  
  
“Yes. It’s fun to fly. To feel the wind flow through your hair and it works wonders to stop worrying about everything.” Hadrian told him. “Do it for me, please.”  
  
Voldemort opened his mouth, but then closed it again at the plea. Hadrian seemed almost hopeful and it was clear that his guardian angel really wanted to fly together with him. For whatever reason he couldn’t fathom why.  
  
Still seeing Hadrian flying there, wings softly moving to keep Hadrian afloat above the water, Voldemort made his decision. It wasn’t as if he could say no… not when Hadrian was looking at him like this, green eyes silently pleading for him to comply.  
  
It was those eyes that shone with something like HOPE. Or maybe it was simply the way that Hadrian made him feel… For he flew together with Severus and Bellatrix before when he taught them. But he couldn’t recall ever flying just to have fun…  
  
Not since many years ago at least… Red eyes closed and a sigh left his mouth as he gave in to Hadrian’s wishes.  
  
“Tom,” Hadrian started and Voldemort opened his eyes. For one second the Dark Lord still saw that pleading look before it changed. Hadrian knew he had won and slowly a bright smile appeared on his angel’s face. “Come on then!” His angel called out to him as he flew up and made a small loop.  
  
A small snort escaped him at Hadrian’s enthusiasm. It was almost contagious… As if he could feel Hadrian’s excitement in his own body or mind. Voldemort took a step forward, hoping that even in his dreams he would be able to control his magic so that he would be able to fly.  
  
As the magic gathered around him, Voldemort let the wind raise him up and forced his gaze towards Hadrian who was clearly waiting for him.  
  
Those emerald eyes glistered and the smile on Hadrian’s face widened even more. It was if he was saying without any words. ‘ _Come. Come fly with me and have fun._ ’  
  
Bracing himself Voldemort soared towards Hadrian, who let out a squeal of laughter and flew away from him a bit. Hadrian didn’t stop laughing and smiling as Voldemort was floating in the air now as well.  
  
The Dark Lord watched intrigued as his angel flew towards him and circled around him. Red eyes followed the movement with a hungry look that went unseen. The air around Hadrian had shifted and his guardian angel was beaming with joy and happiness.  
  
In the short time period that he knew Hadrian, Voldemort had never seen him quite like this. So carefree and so happy…  
  
For the second time in his life Voldemort felt completely and utterly enthralled. The first time being when he saw Hadrian years ago during that awful war… Hadrian’s laughter stopped and Voldemort pressed his lips tightly together as he saw how his angel looked towards him. Those green eyes sparkling and that breath-taking smile made him want to smile as well.  
  
“Come on, Tom!” Hadrian called as he flapped his wings and flew backwards a bit.  
  
Voldemort wanted to let go. To feel like this forever. He wanted… craved, longed for more _. It is impossible to touch an angel…_ He shifted and lunged forward, straight towards Hadrian who let out another squeal as he moved further away.  
  
It was like a cat and mouse game as Voldemort flew after his guardian angel, trying to catch up to the beautiful entity that had captured him, even without him fully knowing it.  
  
The sound of Hadrian’s laughter echoed through the dreamscape, mixing with the waves underneath them. It was like music in his ears and it was this moment that Voldemort realised he always wanted to see Hadrian smile and to hear him laugh.  
  
It was this moment that changed their relationship completely as Voldemort felt the emotions course through him. His own, but also Hadrian’s. It was as if their connection was stronger now, as if walls that blocked it had been lowered.  
  
Without his own accord, Voldemort felt his mouth curve upwards as he sped up. Hadrian who looked over his shoulder froze for one second and the Dark Lord almost bumped into him.  
  
Just as quickly however the scenery changed and the endless ocean beneath them was sand all of a sudden. Hadrian dove down, barely missing Voldemort’s hand that tried to catch him.  
  
All movement stopped, as Voldemort looked down and he saw those green gleaming eyes look back at him. Hadrian smiled, but at the same time tears appeared in those beautiful eyes.  
  
Voldemort stiffened and his smile faded, only then feeling how unnatural it felt. He had smiled… he hadn’t smiled in like forever and even then most of his smiles had been fake. Only to get what he wanted, but this… this was somehow different.  
  
“You can feel it, don’t you Tom?” Hadrian asked softly.  
  
Voldemort remained quiet, unable to truly understand what he was feeling and what exactly was happening. It made him almost regret in giving in to Hadrian’s wished to fly with him.  
  
“Darker emotions… like anger, hatred, depressing thoughts and so on keeps our connection blocked. But happiness, joy and love open it. If you feel anger, you could easily block me out, because I will be unable to get through the haze of rage you will be in. But the happier and more at ease you are the easier it is for me to make connect with you.”  
  
Voldemort was sure a look of disgust crossed over his face at the word ‘love’ especially as he saw and heard Hadrian sigh softly. There was nothing that Hadrian didn’t know about him. His angel knew his dislike of anything regarding to love.  
  
Voldemort saw Hadrian blink at him, as if somehow trying to understand him better. “Tom…” Hadrian started and he just knew what his angel was going to say.  
  
“No.” Voldemort interrupted him before Hadrian could even speak.  
  
Hadrian closed his mouth again. “Alright…” He muttered and then as if nothing had happened a smile graced his face. “Want to fly some more?”  
  
Voldemort watched him, despite knowing that Hadrian would someday bring up the horcruxes or even his mother again, he couldn’t find it in himself to deny him now. He wanted to feel like that again. “Try to keep up with me then.” He smirked at the angel and flew away.  
  
Silence for one brief second, before he heard Hadrian laugh. The sound of his angel’s laughter grew louder and Voldemort, glancing over his shoulder, sped up. Hadrian was beaming and looking so bright.  
  
It was as if he was looking straight into a bright light that only shone brighter with every laugh that left Hadrian’s lips. A warm feeling settled inside of him, but Voldemort didn’t acknowledge. He looked away, breaking eye contact and a smile appeared on his face that went unseen by Hadrian.    
  
Voldemort increased his pace and dove down, barely touching the water beneath him. After a few seconds he slowed down and looked sideways when he heard the flipping of angel wings. Hadrian was soaring next to him and he saw how his angel stretched his hand down, touching the water, making it ripple as he continued to fly over it.  
  
Hadrian glanced up at him, smiling brightly. He didn’t need to say any words, for Voldemort saw it in those green eyes. Without speaking Hadrian was saying ‘ _I love you, Tom’._    
  
The warmth inside him increased and Voldemort vowed that he would finish the potion. Ever since Hadrian told him about past lives and soulmates and such, he started to create a potion similar to a kind of trance in which people relived their previous lives.  
  
Maybe one day he would actually use it. Maybe one day he would actually know what it felt like to have Hadrian as his lover.  
  
Hadrian’s smile slowly faded and Voldemort looked away, aware that his angel had picked up on his thoughts. It was nothing new that Hadrian didn’t approve of his methods and it wasn’t like Hadrian could understand it anyway.  
  
It was clear however that Hadrian realised as well that he didn’t want to talk about it. “I caught up to you.” His angel said in a tainting voice.  
  
Voldemort looked over seeing Hadrian grinning at him, as they both slowly slowed down and stopped flying. He snorted softly. “Because I let you.”  
  
Hadrian merely laughed at his response and for right now, they didn’t think about anything that could destroy their good moods. Voldemort didn’t look away from Hadrian as his angel laughed loudly.  
  
“As if you could win, Tom,” Hadrian exclaimed loudly with a grin. “I am the better flyer!”  
**-End flashback-  
**  
“Tom?” Hadrian asked and Tom opened his eyes. Hadrian was standing there, green eyes looking down at him and his angel seemed worried. Tom stiffened as suddenly he noticed those beautifully white feathered wings were gone and it was like he woke up from a dream into a nightmare. “Are you alright?” Harry asked.  
   
Slowly Tom blinked his eyes, seeing the ocean and the blue endless sky behind Harry. The memory still in the forefront of his mind. Maybe looking back on it now, it was that moment when he truly had fallen in love with Hadrian. He had just never known it to be love… But right now, those memories made sense in a way they never had before.    
  
“That is the best memory you have of…” Harry muttered unsurely and then stopped shy of saying Hadrian’s name.  
  
The silence lingered between them and Tom forced himself to look into those emerald eyes. His hands tightened on his knees as he slowly uncrossed his legs and stood up. “Are you finished talking to them?” He asked coldly. Part of him repelled that he spoke towards Harry in such a tone, but he was too tired to hide his obvious irritation, especially at being caught daydreaming about Hadrian.  
  
Harry seemed to stiffen for one second as well, picking up on his bad mood. “I was worried about you,” Harry whispered, a look of concern still etched onto his face. “I felt that you had pulled back inside our mind and I thought that…” His voice trailed off and understanding slowly dawned in those emerald eyes. “I… will leave you alone for now.”  
  
Something inside him froze at those words and Tom reached out, but Harry had already turned around and left.  
  
Tom closed his mouth, unsure of when exactly he had opened it. He had wanted to call out to Harry, but the young wizard was gone before he could utter one word. His outstretched hand slowly dropped to his side as he stared at the place where Harry had been a few seconds ago. Quickly focusing his attention outwards, he felt that the other wizard was still awake, although already in bed.  
  
Red eyes narrowed slightly as he felt that Harry was blocking him and his thoughts. Tom tried to force his way through, but Harry’s voice resonated through the mindscape. “Stop. I think we both need some time alone to process this all, Tom…”  
  
Tom stopped, dread filling him with those words and he glanced up at blue sky, seeing a few soft white clouds drift by. His rigid stance slowly relaxed as he dropped to his knees, his mind shutting down. The soft sand underneath him giving away a bit as his knees buried into it.  
  
Red empty eyes looked down and stared at the grains of sand, as if they could give him all the answers he needed. As if somehow it could take away all his pain and suffering. All that guilt that was weighing so heavily upon him now.  
  
And was he truly jealous of everyone around Harry? Had he any right to be even jealous of them? No, he didn’t, but it didn’t take away the fact that he was indeed very jealous… Because here he was, stuck inside the young wizard’s body and mind. Unable to truly do anything. He hadn’t been able to make Harry laugh or smile… not like Luna did, not like his younger self did. Or Sirius, Remus. That stupid know-it-all girl or even the Weasley boy.  
  
No, if anything he had only made Harry suffer. Had taken the boy’s parents from him and tried to kill him. How pathetic… he had been so focused upon this new mission and just the mere sound of Harry’s laughter had completely and utterly unravelled him.  
  
Tom cursed and hated himself. Red eyes closed in self-pity and defeat.  
  
He remembered the feeling of having Harry wrapped in his arms, of feeling those warm fingers entwine with his own. That was enough… had been enough. To just finally hold him, because Tom didn’t want to push his luck.  
  
Despite everything Harry was still 14, a minor. And Tom knew… He knew that one wrong move and Harry would turn his back on him, lock him away again, and shut him out. He had nothing to say, because in the end this wasn´t his body…  
  
And if his hands would wander and Harry would feel uncomfortable, then without a doubt Harry would lock him away, because he had seen the child´s fear of his desires and he couldn’t blame him... Red eyes slowly opened and his vision was blurry. Unaware that he had been crying at all Tom slowly raised his hand to his face and felt the wet tear tracks on his cheeks.  
  
A small sob tore from his throat. “Harry…” It was nothing but a small whisper. A plea almost.  
  
He felt like he was being destroyed from the inside out. His guilt was eating him up, tearing him down. Breaking him until nothing but this pathetic version of himself remained.   
  
_‘You are not him. Do not think you can fool me! Hadrian is gone…’  
_  
His own voice screamed, filled with grief and despair as he looked upon an infant with familiar green eyes and Tom shut his eyes and covered his ears with his hands, attempting to stop the madness. A green light flashed and even with his eyes closed he could see it and he screamed, writhing even when he felt arms wrap around him. He pushed against the other body, because he needed to get away, but the grip tightened and someone was yelling.  
  
“Tom!” Someone screamed his name and the person sounded worried, but it all felt distant. The voice however he recognised, but through the haze of emotions he couldn’t place it.  
  
His struggles increased as he screamed and tried to free himself from the other’s grip. He was stuck… stuck in a body. A baby was crying and he was crying with it… He was ripped apart and in so much pain and so much guilt… He was drowning in it and suddenly… warm lips crushed against his.  
  
All his movements stopped immediately and red eyes shot open. Wide emerald eyes stared back at him. Those eyes, Hadrian… No, it was Harry who was holding onto to him. Hadrian… was gone.  
  
Slowly the younger wizard pulled back, the warm lips against his own disappearing with it. Tom sat there frozen, feeling Harry’s hands on his shoulders and he felt that he was trembling.  
  
Both of them kept staring at each other and the silence was tense and awkward. A chaste kiss… their lips barely touched, but it brought him out of his distressed state. Red eyes glanced down at Harry’s red soft lips with an unmistakable hunger.  
  
That small taste had left him longing for more. A need he thought he had suppressed reared his ugly head up. Tom wanted to devour his angel. To take and take, until nothing was left. To see those eyes clouded in pleasure and lust, all because of him. Harry was his and his alone. No one would ever see him like that.  
  
Without thinking and only following that intense need, Tom’s hands tangled in Harry’s unruly black hair and crushed their lips together again. He could touch him now. Kiss him and show him true bliss.  
  
A muffled cry left Harry’s mouth and hands grasped his shoulders. Trying to push him away and before Tom could even react the sand beneath him disappeared and his hands and lips touched air instead of Harry.  
  
Harry had faded away…  
  
“Forgive me, Tom.” Harry’s voice sounded sincere and red eyes widened as he fell down into the black pit, seeing the sand fall after him, burying him.  
  
Tom screamed as he fought against it. The lingering feeling of Harry’s lips against his own, almost not worth this punishment. “No!” He screamed as he desperately tried to leave the mindscape, to not get locked down inside Harry’s mind again.  
  
Regret washed over him, realising that he indeed couldn´t overpower Harry. Because this was after all Harry’s body and mind… He was nothing but a mere parasite and the sand closed in on him as shackles appeared around his ankles, wrists and neck. Tying him down here and keeping him away from Harry once more…  
  
“Harry!” Tom screamed. But his scream was ignored.

* * *

 

Harry cried, his fingers tightening in his hair as he wanted to rip it out in his frustration.  
  
How stupid had he been? But Tom was so in distress that he couldn’t think of any other way to get him out of it. Now… he had awoken desires that were buried so deeply inside Tom.  
  
Desires that were so tainted and it left him feeling dirty and disgusted. A shiver ran over his spine just thinking back on how Tom had kissed him.  
  
Harry was breathing heavily and his eyes were unseen as he rocked himself on the bed, trying desperately to calm down and not lose his mind. He kept telling himself that he hadn’t known any other way to get through to Tom. And it unnerved him that he never before had seen Tom in such a state.  
  
Luna and Snape had left again some time ago, leaving him alone again, but now he regretted it.  
If only they were still here… but he had send them away because he felt that something had been wrong with Tom and now…   
  
Now he was completely alone with his demons and Tom’s. With the monster inside of Tom that was overtaking by lust. The monster that Tom had been able to control to this point on and he so foolishly had destroyed everything. He acted purely on instinct and far too rash…  
  
And though Harry had briefly wondered how long it would be before Tom lost control like this… He had hoped that his soulmate wouldn’t lose control, but the awful truth was that it was so easy for Tom to lose himself.  
  
His soul was in so many pieces and his sanity, together with his control was practically non-existent. Harry should be grateful that Tom had been able to hold on for this long and because of his mistake… Slowly his rocking stopped, but his breathing remained highly irregular.  
  
Green eyes closed as Harry softly cried. “Forgive me, Tom. Please forgive me.” He kept muttering the words, unheard by everyone else. It was like a mantra, because he didn’t want to lock Tom away, but he also couldn’t deal with the desire he had seen in those red eyes.  
  
He shouldn’t have kissed him. It kept repeating inside his mind. He shouldn’t have kissed him…  
  
But it was too late now and this might change everything. If the horcrux inside him was unable to block his desire and lust out then… Harry opened his eyes at the awful revelation. He would be all alone again…  
  
Even though Luna assured him that he never was alone he would feel alone. This burden he was carrying, no one could take it from him. Not even Severus, who so desired to take it away from him. Not Luna, who would do everything in her power to relieve him from his burden. No one could help him… In the end he was the only one who could help Tom.  
  
Harry closed his eyes tightly, as if it could help him shut out every memory and bad thought. As if it could stop his suffering. “Forgive me…” He muttered. His voice sounded more broken than he ever heard before.  
  
**Slytherin Manor – 18 September:**  
Tom’s eyes never left Voldemort’s body, not even for one second. The house-elves delivered the food to him, because he didn’t want to lose sight of the Dark Lord. And even when he needed to go to the loo he made sure the house-elves watched Voldemort and would inform him of any changed in the ritual circle.  
  
He also took a potion to remain awake, because he just couldn’t take the risk. Eventually he had also asked for some books to pass the time and in the meantime tried to find out what kind of ritual Voldemort had used, but none of the books described this ritual. It was maybe a tracking spell that Voldemort created himself…  
  
But because Tom was so focused upon him, he saw it the moment it happened. The runes surrounding the ritual circle burned away to dust and his eyes widened as he quickly got up, Harry's wand ready in his hand. Not looking away from Voldemort’s form as the Dark Lord woke up. Voldemort sat there, kneeled in the grass before he got up.  
  
Red-slitted eyes met his and Tom felt something inside him tense at the anger he saw in those blazing orbs. Voldemort had clearly not succeeded in finding Harry.  
  
“If I can’t find Hadrian, then I will lure him out.” Voldemort hissed angrily and Tom stood there as the Dark Lord swept past him. Turning around he saw how Voldemort walked into the manor, not even bothering to explain his new founded plan.  
  
Tom’s grip tightened on Harry’s wand as he quickly moved after his main soul, knowing he better find out what the other was planning. “What do you mean lure him out?” He asked as he caught up to the Dark Lord.  
  
“Hadrian greatly disliked whenever I attacked, tortured or killed others,” Voldemort explained and Tom stopped, eyes wide. “If I attack, for example Diagon Alley, he will certainly come.”  
  
Voldemort didn’t even seem to notice that he had stopped as the Dark Lord entered the study and the door closed with a loud bang. Tom stared at the empty hallway, part of him excited and part of him afraid.  
  
He wanted nothing more than to find Harry… And if this plan from Voldemort worked, he didn’t want to put a stop to it. An attack on Diagon Alley… Innocent people could possibly lose their lives for this. He could warn Dumbledore… and prevent this. But if he did, then Voldemort would be unable to lure Harry out.  
  
Tom’s eyes narrowed and he straightened as he made his decision. Besides what Dumbledore didn’t know, wouldn’t hurt him. He could easily lie and tell the headmaster that he had no idea about Voldemort’s sudden plan to attack Diagon Alley. No one would know and that way he could find Harry.  
  
If he timed it well, he could snatch Harry away before Voldemort even saw him. It was time to grab the invisibility cloak he left in Grimmauld Place, while Voldemort prepared his plans for the attack.  
 

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Severus thinks back on the odd conversation he had with Harry Potter. The Diary horcrux goes back to Grimmauld place to retrieve the invisibility cloak, but ends up getting questioned by a wary Remus. While Harry and the horcrux inside of him reach an understanding and make a deal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again it has been ages since I updated this fic and I apologise. I was a bit stuck with it I guess. Thank the discord for bringing this fic to my attention again, so that I would finish this chapter and finally update it lol. 
> 
> I can’t promise anything regarding my update schedule, but I will try not to take months(or more like half a year…)

**Chapter 7:**

**Hogwarts, Hallway – 18 September 1994:**  
He couldn’t have known… There was no way Potter could have known and yet...

Severus was silent as he escorted Luna Lovegood back to her common room. The blond girl had looked up at him, but said nothing after the conversations they had with Potter. Those silver eyes staring at him as if looking straight through him and all his secrets were out in the open as if Occlumency shields didn't even exist. It was obvious to him now that she also held knowledge that no one could possess.

But Harry’s knowledge was different. The words would haunt him till he would fall asleep. That is if he would be able to get any sleep this night. Probably not, because his mind was working overtime now. _‘If you feel guilty about telling Voldemort the prophecy, don’t. Everything was set in stone and it played out just like the angels wanted.’_

The way Harry said those last words. There had been an underlying anger in his voice. Anger that was buried deep down inside of the child, but he caught a glimpse of it and it terrified him. Never before had he seen those green eyes looked so murderous.

Luna started humming next to him and he abruptly stopped. The blond girl took a few more steps before also coming to a halt and turning to face him. Silvery eyes watched him and she looked so small and fragile all of a sudden. “I already know whose side you are on.” She whispered, her soft voice echoing through the hallway.

Severus sneered at her, wanting to tell her that she couldn’t possible know, but she beat him to it. “You are willing to lay down your life if it means protecting Harry.” She said and slowly his mouth closed again. Luna smiled, but it seemed unnatural. “I know… I know…” She muttered and then she sighed and continued. “…but remember that you don’t have to carry this burden alone either. There are many around Harry who would willingly lay down their life to protect him.”

“Miss Lovegood…- ” He started but she shook her head.

“I know the way to my dorm, professor. Thank you for accompanying me.” With those words she turned around and skipped away, leaving him alone in the hallway.

Yet he couldn’t help but think that her smile had been off.

Everything about this night had been off… Hadrian and Harry. Was there no difference between them? And why had Voldemort not summoned any of his followers?

His hand moved towards his covered Dark Mark and his fingers tightened in his robe. A stain he wished to erase intertwined with a past he preferred to forget. His eyes closed as the conversation that he had with… Harry this evening entered his mind.

Flashback  
Severus followed Potter as they walked through the Forbidden Forest and entered a strange opening. When Potter hissed at it, it opened. A glance to the blond girl walking next him showed him that she was not bothered by everything that was happening.

Had Albus been telling the truth about the girl? But it was so hard to believe. It sounded more like a fairy-tale than reality. Angels existed in this messed up world? “Sorry, it is not much. But since I am kind of on the run it is all I have.” Harry muttered as he lead them into a small room filled with books and a portrait, which was currently empty.

Severus wouldn't be surprised if it was a portrait of Salazar Slytherin himself since he believed to be standing in the Chamber of Secrets.

If it was under better circumstances he would have been delighted to stand here in this famous chamber, but right now after hearing Potter say those words it only made him feel like he failed Lily all over again.

Severus saw how Luna smiled and sat down at the offered chair. Potter looked at him and there was a strange look in those familiar eyes. “Professor.” Potter gestured to another empty chair and considering the things they would probably discus Severus knew he would prefer to be seated.

He walked towards the chair, seeing Potter smile at him briefly. As he sat down Potter sighed and pulled another chair closer to the small table.

“Luna. I can't thank you enough.” Potter started as he looked at her. The blond girl smiled sadly and inclined her head. Severus couldn't help but feel like he didn't belong here.

But then Potter's gaze was on him. “There is much I want to say…” Potter sounded unsure of himself as he said those words. “I don't know on whose side you are, sir. But I do know you are not all bad.”

“Potter. What is the meaning of this?” He asked even though he dreaded the answer.

Potter sighed and cast his gaze down. “How much do you know?”

Severus debated in his mind for a few seconds before choosing to tell the truth. He had a feeling that neither Lovegood or Potter would appreciate it if he lied now. “I have heard about Hadrian. The headmaster told me and explained me about Lovegood's gift and you being the reincarnation of the Dark Lord's guardian angel.”

Potter was looking at him once more and nodded, seemingly relieved. “Good. That will make things easier.” The young boy said and he thanked Lovegood, before once more looking at him. Severus could barely wrap his mind around the fact that Potter never said it wasn’t true. Instead Potter appeared grateful that he wouldn’t have much to explain.

And was that truly pity he saw in Potter's eyes? But before he could say one word Potter spoke.

“I am sorry, sir. You have been dragged into this mess…” Potter looked pained and sighed before continuing. “I am going to something from you, especially now that I have the chance.”

“Potter,” Severus started, not knowing why it bothered him too look the boy so defeated, more than before. Back then he didn't think that anyone would be capable of breaking that foolish Gryffindor spirit, but now…. “ What happened?” His voice was softer as he asked the question and it shocked him.

Potter also seemed slighty confused before snorting and a fond look appeared on his face. Severus narrowed his eyes at the obvious amusement.

“Sorry,” Potter quickly apologised raising his hands in an innocent gesture. “I will explain…”

Severus gave a nod, as he waited for Potter to gather his thoughts and started speaking. “Voldemort… He gave me a potion which rendered me unconscious for a few while. My…” Here Potter stopped, frowning slightly. “My mind was close to breaking as I relived all my previous lives. When I woke up, I did the only thing I could do, I left.”

Severus knew that much, but he hadn’t known how much impact this potion had on the boy. But seeing Potter with his own two eyes now, it was obvious that the boy was still struggling with a lot of things. He wanted nothing more than to take this burden away from Lily’s only son, but he just didn’t know what to do in such an odd situation. “They are all searching for you everywhere. Your Godfather is worried as is the werewolf.” He said, seeing a flicker of guilt spread over Potter’s features.

“I can’t go back, professor.” Potter muttered as he fidgeted with his hands and glanced down at the table. At first it made him wonder what stopped Potter from returning, but rethinking about this mess and the conversation he realised it why.

This boy in front of him wasn’t the same boy who had been kidnapped months ago. Severus could see that now and something inside him ached at that thought. The Dark Lord had utterly destroyed Potter. Or at least the boy’s mind, but the mind was fragile thing and it was a sign of true strength that Potter sat there. But it didn’t take away the damage that was done and it could never be undone.

“Can I ask one favour of you, sir. It will be the only thing I will ever ask of you.” Potter sounded almost desperate as he asked this and Severus found himself nodding. Looking quite relieved Potter continued. “You know about the diadem of Rowena Ravenclaw, correct?”

Severus frowned, not having expected such a change of subject. “Yes, of course. Everyone knows about the artefacts of the founders.” The words you imbecile were not said but implied nonetheless. Potter grinned briefly as if knowing that he thought it.

“You know about the Room of Requirement inside the castle?” Potter asked and this time it was Severus’s turn to look confused, because he had never heard of the room before.

“I will show him the way, Harry.” Lovegood offered next to him and of course the all-seeing blond did know about it, Severus thought darkly in his mind as he looked back towards Potter who smiled at her.

“In the Room of Requirement where people hide things, if you keep going left the Diadem will be there, hidden in a small box. Could you bring it back to me?”

“Potter, this is madness. The diadem has been lost for ages.” Severus said, but the boy merely nodded.

“It was found… several years ago, but Voldemort hid it again.” Potter said and it seemed like he wanted to share more information with him, but eventually decided against it. “I need it to stop him, sir. To stop him before another war starts.”

Severus didn’t know why a diadem was important to stop the Dark Lord, but he didn’t question it. Especially as the knowledge he possessed in comparison to the two children was non-existent. That thought made him pause as he saw Potter looking at him expectantly.

“That is the only thing I will ask of you. Bring the diadem to me and I promise you I will never bother you ever again.” Potter said and how could he say no. In a way he would never be able to say no, so he promised that he would find the diadem and bring it to him.

Severus knew that with a lot of knowledge burdens could pile up on people, but to see two young children already carrying such a heavy burden was something that didn’t sit quite right with him.

After their promise Severus realised that Potter and Lovegood wanted to talk to each other and he stood up, walking through the chamber. The two were soon talking and sometimes he could hear them laugh softly, as if they didn’t have a worry at all, while a few seconds ago both had been very serious and the fate of the world rested upon Potter’s shoulders…

Severus just let them as he walked through the few bookshelves, seeing books standing in there that he never thought he would see with his own eyes. If the Dark Lord had spent his time here and had read all of these books, Severus could imagine the knowledge the wizard possessed.

It was a few minutes later when Severus knew they should return, even though he hated the fact that he had to break their happy bubble. Severus walked up to them, only to hear Potter say that it would be better if they left.

As he observed the boy, he noticed that Potter seemed troubled and their laughs and smiles were gone again. Even though he had witnessed the first war with the Dark Lord, he couldn’t stand the view in front of him.

No kid should have to carry such burdens as these two did. And if he could help, he would. Before leaving Potter asked him to stay behind for one second while Lovegood waited a bit deeper into the tunnels.

Severus stared down at him, only to be shocked by the words that left the younger’s mouth. “If you feel guilty about telling Voldemort the prophecy, don’t. Everything was set in stone and it played out just like the angels wanted.”

Severus stood there frozen as Potter looked away and even then he was unable to move. Potter looked furious and if looks could kill whoever had angered the boy would be long dead by now. This was a look he never once expected seeing on the boy.

“You should go… I want to be alone now.” Potter said and turned around, walking away. Severus wanted to reach out and stop him, because being alone like this would only make matters worse.

Surely Potter’s mind was still unstable the way it was now and he should get help, but at the same time he understand Potter’s reasoning to remain alone. Still he didn’t like it one bit. “Professor.” It was Lovegood, calling out to him behind him and Potter had already left the room. In a way it was good to know the boy was alive and well, but seeing him like this only made him more concerned.

Severus looked over his shoulder at the blond girl. The one who had lured him down here. With an inward sigh he turned and guided her out of this damp place. He promised however he would remember how to go down there and keep the boy company once in a while, if he could get the door to open without parseltongue abilities that was...

Because isolation, especially after everything which had happened was not good at all. Maybe he could even help Potter fix his mind, but what would he see in there? Visions of heaven and angels? Severus shook his head, briefly glancing down at Lovegood who was walking next to him as they made their way up into the castle.

**Grimmauld Place – 18 September 1994:**  
It was evening when Tom landed in the foyer of the Black house and walked further inside. Remus who has been sitting in the living room entered the hallway. “Tom?” He asked him.

Tom smiled sadly and shook his head. “No news yet. Last time I saw Voldemort he walked into his study. At least he hasn’t found Harry either.” Deciding to keep the real truth to himself for the time being, he easily lied to the werewolf.

“I see,” Remus muttered and a sad expression appeared on his face as those eyes watched him curiously. It made Tom once again realise that he wasn’t the only one who wanted to find Harry and protect him from al dangers, but he couldn’t help but feel a bit on edge seeing Remus stare at him. “Why are you here?”

Tom shrugged, sticking to partly the truth. “I needed a change of scenery. Voldemort isn’t exactly nice company.”

Remus’s lips twitched a bit as he stepped aside. “You’re welcome here.” Maybe Tom had imagined the slightly curious look, but he wouldn’t let his guard down now.

Tom muttered a thanks as he stepped into the living room. “Anything to drink?” Remus asked and he glanced over his shoulder to the elder wizard.

“Just water is fine, thanks.” Tom said as he sat down, wondering how he could make his way upstairs and get the cloak from the hidden compartment he had created in the dresser. He believed it was safe there, especially as the house was under a Fidelius charm. But he didn’t trust Sirius and Remus snooping through Harry’s stuff in their despair. Tom sat down on the couch and a few seconds later Remus walked back in, two glasses in his hands.

Tom watched as Remus sat down in the other chair across from him. “You know I still find it hard to believe your story and that of Hadrian’s.” Remus muttered as he watched the teen.

Tom hummed as he took a small sip of the water after quickly testing it for potions, which luckily went unnoticed by the werewolf. “Do you now.” He drawled, because he wasn’t planning on indulging the other. Remus was a bit too clever for his liking and he could already see that something had changed in his behaviour.

It was subtle, but it seemed like Remus was a bit more wary or on edge and if was now fishing for information, it couldn’t be good.

“Yes,” Remus said softly. “The conversation the other day in the headmaster’s office wouldn’t leave my mind.”

Tom sighed and leaned back, keeping his glass in his hand. “The headmaster and I go way back if that is what you are curious about.”

“I wonder how though. You are not a Hogwarts student even though you are in your teens.” Now it was blatantly obvious Remus wanted information about him and Tom knew he had to thread carefully now.

“What is it you want to know? You can stop beating around the bush, you know.” He said, wondering if the wizard would be as blunt as a Gryffindor or perhaps Remus would try and goad the information out of him.

Remus’s eyes narrowed. “You are a follower of Voldemort, but at your age it is surprising. As well as the fact that you can enter and leave Slytherin manor whenever you please. I doubt Voldemort would grant all of his followers that privilege.”

Tom remained quiet, merely watching as Remus was stating the obvious facts that Sirius had missed. Or maybe Sirius had just not spoken about it considering the fact that Sirius owed him for giving him back his freedom. Or maybe the damage from all those years in Azkaban wasn't healed just yet.

Instead it seemed like Remus was the brain of the two right now. “Who are you really?” Remus asked the one question Tom dreaded to hear.

Tom could see that he was not getting away from this. Remus wanted answers, that much was obvious. The problem was that Tom wasn’t planning on giving him any.

“Tom Riddle.” Tom replied. “I thought you knew that by now.”

Remus’s gaze never left his, but Tom never felt him trying to break through his Occlumency shields. “There is something odd about you, Tom...” Remus muttered thoughtfully. “And I have a feeling you are keeping us in the dark about many things.”

“All you need to know is that I will do anything to protect Harry. And that is the only thing you and Sirius care about.” Tom stated as he took a small sip of water.

“I know. You don’t care for me, for Sirius, but for Harry’s sake you made sure that Sirius didn’t die because of the vow.” Remus said, a small frown on his face. “You saved Harry from his relatives as well, but I can’t help but find it odd that a follower of You-Know-Who would help an enemy like this.”

Remus never fully trusted him, but at the same time didn’t have enough information to put all the pieces together and for that Tom was grateful, because otherwise he might have needed to erase some memories or make sure that the werewolf would keep silent. The latter wouldn’t be pretty, especially because Remus still had no idea what he was capable off.

Tom remained silent, merely watching the other wizard. It seemed to have the desired effect as he saw Remus shift a bit, clearly feeling uncomfortable. “Harry is my soulmate as you know. I won't let any harm befall him, but make no mistake if anyone stands in my way who is not named Harry or Luna I will not hesitate to make them disappear.”

Remus seemed to understand the warning. “I don’t know if I should be happy to hear you say you will do anything to protect Harry or if I should be highly disturbed that you saying something like that at your age.” Remus muttered after a few seconds.

Tom shrugged. “I don't care what you think of me honestly. As long as you do not stand in my way, we will get along just fine.” with those words he drained his glass and put it on the table.

Remus watched him but did nothing and remained silent as he got up and walked towards the stairs.

Tom knew however when he closed the door to Harry's bedroom that this wasn't the end of it. Remus was the kind of type to keep searching for answers until he found them.

Tom briefly wondered how the werewolf would react when he knew the truth, but then again he had more important matters.

Opening the drawer Tom softly hissed the password and the hidden compartment opened. His fingers trailed over the cloak. It would give him an advantage, because he wouldn't get a second chance. Especially if his future self would find out his actions.

That night Tom stayed as to not arouse any more suspicion. Though Remus seemed to ignore his presence completely, which actually suited Tom just fine.

**Grimmauld Place - 19 September 1994:**  
Remus didn't bother talking to Tom after their conversation yesterday and the tension between the two of them was quite high because of it.

That wasn't really surprising considering Tom had basically threatened him, not outright but still. Tom would dispose of those who stood in his way but at the same time the teen was very protective and also worried about Harry.

The months when Harry had been in a coma and Tom had made them vow not to tell anyone about the young one's state and where Harry was were the hardest days.

Sirius and he had not understood the link between it all. What was Tom Riddle to Voldemort and why had Voldemort handed Harry a potion to give him back memories of previous lives? Had the big bad Dark Lord granted Tom this? To have the memories of this Hadrian returned to Harry? Is that what Tom had wanted, but then why would Tom have told them about Harry being in Voldemort's hands? Too many questions he had and too little answers.

Remus had already felt that there was something odd about the stoic teen. Tom didn't and would probably never reveal his secrets. But there was someone else who was clearly withholding information from them.

Albus Dumbledore. Remus didn't know what Tom and the headmaster had spoken about, but it was the first time that Remus saw something different in Tom Riddle.

After seeing the damage in the headmaster's office and Tom looking quite furious Remus knew his instincts had been right. Tom Riddle was dangerous, more so because he was very, very close with Voldemort for whatever reason.

That night Remus was so troubled that he barely slept, instead he kept listening and wondering if Tom would leave in the middle of the night. Maybe to go back to Voldemort and give some kind of report. It was at that point that Remus fully realises that he didn't trust Tom any longer.

There was no doubt inside his mind that Tom would never harm Harry but still Remus couldn't help but worry. After long hours morning came and Remus believed Tom hadn't left the house either.

Remus quickly showered, hoping to wake up a bit because he felt pretty tired and sluggish. But as he finished and went downstairs he saw Tom already sitting in the kitchen, drinking tea and reading the morning newspaper.

Remus frowned as he silently observed the young teen. At first sight Tom looked to be a normal kid. Polite and charming and from what Sirius told him later on Harry was always smiling and laughing at Tom.

Remus saw Tom lower his cup and those dark eyes looked up at him. It didn't bother him that he had been caught staring and he just walked into the kitchen, preparing some tea and breakfast.

“Good morning.” Tom said and Remus looked over his shoulder. He greeted the teen in return, but there was a heavy tension between them still.

Remus actually felt relieved when the teen left after breakfast. Right now he didn't care where Tom went. But instead he floo-called the headmaster's office the moment Tom was gone.

“Remus?” Albus greeted him with a soft smile.

“Can I come through? I have some questions.” Remus asks, hoping that at least Albus would give him some answers.

**Chamber of Secrets – 19 September 1994:**  
Time passed by and Harry found himself unable to sleep. Lying inside the bed, he could only think about how he had locked Tom away and that his soulmate would probably be furious by now.

Turning and slipping out of the bed, Harry grew more restless and as midnight passed he knew he had to make a decision. He could never let Tom out again or talk to him and he preferred the latter. But even then talking to Tom wouldn’t be easy either.

Harry dropped back on the bed, knowing that walking around wouldn’t help. Why couldn’t there be a simple way to fix this all? Why couldn’t this be easier?

Harry closed his eyes as he cradled his head, feeling it start to throb. He needed some sleep and his mind at ease, but sadly he would get neither of those. With a heavy sigh he let himself fall back and pulled back inside his mind, letting Tom free in the process.

The familiar blue sea stretched out in front of him and warm sand was underneath his feet. He saw Tom appear and his stomach tightened at the sight.

Tom was sitting there, not even looking up, instead staring down at his feet, his arms wrapped around his legs as his head rested atop of his knees. It had been long ago since Harry had seen him so lost and broken…

“Tom...” Harry called out to him softly, but the other wizard didn’t react. Carefully he moved closer and sat down in front of Tom, a safe distance between them.

“I didn’t think you would return.” Tom muttered and finally red eyes glanced up, meeting his.

“I couldn’t just leave you like this.” Harry whispered, seeing Tom shrug as he shook his head with broken smile.

“I wonder which of us is more pitiful right now,” Tom muttered and despite the clear tension Harry let out a soft snort at Tom’s words and Tom looked away. “From my opinion it is you…”

Harry hadn’t expected Tom to say that, but he remained quiet. It was clear that Tom was gathering his thoughts and wanted to speak more now. “After everything I did and everything I took from you…” Tom continued in a soft voice and Harry knew where this was going, but still he didn’t interrupt. “You still come back to me. In the end… I probably will continue to hurt you, because I don’t know any better and yet you will be there, won’t you Harry.” It wasn’t really a question, but more like a statement. Because both of them knew that Harry would never him.

“No matter what you might do, Tom. I will stand by your side, I made that promise years ago and I couldn’t fulfil it back then. Now I will.” Harry said and saw Tom look back at him, silently eyeing him to see if he spoke the truth.

Red eyes softened. “You are such a saint.” Tom said as he closed his eyes. “I don’t understand how you can just forgive me. I don’t understand how you can give so much… love and expect nothing in return.”

Harry placed his hand atop of Tom’s and he saw how those red eyes opened and focused on his hand. “Because I want to see you happy and whole. As Hadrian I wanted nothing more than your happiness, but I was unable to give it to you. Now I can and I will. Don’t think that you don’t deserve me, Tom. Besides I am not a saint, not really.” Honestly he didn’t know what to say to make this better, but following his instincts he said the first words that came to mind.

Tom’s lips quirked upwards and he let out a small chuckle. “You are a saint in comparison to me, Harry. You can’t deny this.”

Harry didn’t say anything and slowly removed his hand, seeing that Tom didn’t move at all, his gaze remaining downcast. “Do you think we can work together?” The question clearly caught Tom off guard as his head shot up and confusion flashed in his eyes.

Tom didn’t instantly reply, clearly thinking about what had happened and Harry had seen his eyes trail lower, glancing at his lips. It made him want to crawl back, but he didn’t move away. It would only make matters worse if he showed how uneasy it made him.

Harry wouldn’t mind their relationship progressing later on… but right now he wasn’t ready for what Tom clearly desired. A fine line had been drawn and the question was if Tom was able to live with it. To wait until he was ready for such a big step.

Harry knew that this was the hardest thing he could ask of Tom, because the Dark Lord had desired him for so long and still did. It was an unhealthy obsession and now he was asking that same person if they could work together if there was something that tremendous in the way between them.

“I won’t do anything you don’t want me too,” Tom started and Harry could hear that he sounded a bit unsure. “Admittedly… I may lose control. The only thing I ask of you that you stop me.”

Harry nodded. “I will. I am not ready for anything like that… just yet.”

Tom was relieved, that much was obvious as he let go of his knees and stretched his legs. Harry silently watched him, knowing that there was now an unspoken agreement between them.

The road ahead would be difficult, but they had each other. Just thinking about that made Harry feel stronger as before and he smiled at Tom. “It will all work out in the end. That is a promise.”

And yet neither of them knew what the future would bring.


End file.
